EMBRACE YOU: Presence & Poison
Episode 39's

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“I will prove that I have cancelled this engagement as I said earlier. If by not seeing me you will stop crying, I will leave now.” I blinked, without realizing I was already crying silently in front of him. Want to remove the wet traces on both my cheeks but useless because in fact more tears when I saw Bayu had turned to walk away from me.

My throbbing hurts so much to hold back the sobbing sound. My chest cavity is in pain, more pain than ever.

Am I being too cruel to her? But I with all my prestige didn't want to prevent it. Maybe it's better that I turn around and go inside mom's house, let this disappointment flow without stopping.

“Mother, I want to talk to you.” I saw my mom sitting on the living room couch. This middle-aged woman

I was surprised to see him coming.

“What's up? So it's true you've captured Jane's fiancee?” Mother blamed me again.

“No. That's a misunderstanding.”

“What misunderstandings? This is the name you've caught wet, still cringe.” Mother replied with her tone as usual. I exhaled a few times so that my voice would not sound pitiful.

I'm sick of the attitude of my mother who always blames me. “Bu, why the hell did mom always blame me?”

“What? Blame what? That mother is advising you! You are a stupid son!”

I wanted to disappear from my mother's presence, she was always like this. “Mother is aware anyway? Her words have hurt my heart all along. Ever since the divorce of mom and dad, mom has been dinging on me. Mom mocked me at every word she said, just for example. Mom calls me a stupid kid.”

“This you, a trivial matter like this alone demands an all-out mother!” Mother's voice sounded higher

from the calm tone I let out.

I realized that I was crying in front of my mother, but the attitude of the mother who was not touched at all made me again feel disappointed.

“Not a problem like mom! But mom has been like this for a long time. Remember you never said I didn't deserve to be a mother's child, you blamed me more in every way, you supported Daniel more than I did. My mother has also demanded a lot since childhood. Mom never asked me how I was doing. She never hugged or kissed me again. Even the tone of voice that mom used on me always sounded angry.”

“Stop! You want until when to constantly blame mom?” Suddenly my mother stood up to me. I

reflexes come to stand up to the mother who is angry and offended.

“See? Even to voice my voice, my mother was already angry! Then I have to get to-”

“OF COURSE MOM WILL BE ANGRY! YOU ARE THIS AS A CHILD USUALLY HAHIN MOTHER!”

I flinched, mom is already shouting now. His face was red and his eyes were already fully glared.

“I'm an adult ma'am. I know what is wrong and what is right. What mom did to me hurt me Mom. I don't want anything, I just want the mother to ask me, the mother who will cook the food, the mother who worries about her daughter coming home at night, the mother who will defend me and advise me, mother who will praise me, mother who loves me completely-”

“So you mean mom is evil??”

Arrgghh can be crazy to face mom. All my words were always negative for him. I looked down, sobbing loudly in front of my mother. My chest cavity was tight, as if there was no oxygen around me.

“When I say something, mom always grabs it bad. So I have to how's mom? What exactly is my fault? Am I a bad boy? It's been almost eighteen years that you've been mad at me, what do I have to fix so you don't always get mad at me? I love my mom more than anything.”

Mom suddenly grabbed both of my shoulders, staring at me with unchanged eyes. “You must not be a child who pretends to forget to keep on beating mom!”

“Bu. Pain.” I wanted to break away from Mom's strong grip, but she held it in.

“What's mom? I'm not blurred, mom's grip is too strong, it hurts so.”

“EVERYTHING BECAUSE OF YOU! YOU ARE SO FUSSY. YOU TALK A LOT!! YOU SAID EVERYTHING BACK THEN. YOU MADE YOUR OWN PARENTS DIVORCE! YOU AND YOUR VOICE THAT RUINED OUR FAMILY!”

I gasped in shock, mother yelling again about the incident when I was seven years old. “T—but dad

indeed having an affair, I often saw him outside the house at that time. A—aku was also a child back then ma'am, all I know is telling you in front of dad.”

“TAP ONLY! YOUR VOICE SEPARATES US!! YOU'RE JUST ROSE'S STEPSON BUT YOUR BEHAVIOR IS SICKENING!”

“A—what did mom say?” My heart was beating so fast, cold sweat appeared all over my body. I heard it clearly. Mom said Aunt Rose's name. Stepchildren what does that mean?

Mother let go of her grip, she immediately turned her face away from my gaze. Mom's acting weird, she's hiding something from me. So who am I? So all this time no one heard my voice.

I wanted to ask further, but I couldn't hear my voice. I lost my voice. Something that I

fear of happening during this suddenly just happens at the wrong time.

“GO FROM HERE!!” After mom dragged me out, she slammed the door in front of my face.

I, who was still shocked by what happened, could only remain silent. My heart was beating faster and my shaking hands made my legs stiff.

Everything was like a dream, obviously mom was yelling at me. Said that I was Aunt Rose's stepdaughter.

Butwhy? Why is my mother taking care of me? Is it true that you are not my real mother?

There are so many questions that pop into my head. I who felt dizzy finally turned to get out of

mother's yard. My right hand started beating my tight chest, hoping I could breathe normally. I hope this pain goes away.

Since then my tears kept coming out soaking my cheeks, my limp feet kept leading me in an indiscriminate direction.

All my thoughts and memories with my mom and dad revolved like an old movie.

I shouldn't be like this.

I must be strong!

I can't keep crying!

There are still a lot of people out there who have more problems than me.

Work and college assignments are waiting for me to finish. I'm an adult and this problem should be me

already expected it, guessing the attitude of the mother who never changed since long ago.

All the thoughts of encouragement in my heart continued to sound but I realized, both my hands were still

the intense shaking indicated that my heart was still very sick.

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