EMBRACE YOU: Presence & Poison
EPISODE 4

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“Ka Icha, trust me this time, hm?“

“There is no guarantee this business will be successful. Instead of thinking about an unclear business, why do not you apply for work only. Graduates of the faculty of the city's renowned campus are sure to get jobs easily.”

Mom looked at me irritated. “I know you were always like this. stingy towards your own family. You used to live alone, nothing alone. But don't stop him from succeeding!”

“I didn't prevent him from bu's success, it's just—“

“Enough!”

I was silent for a moment when I heard Mom, but it was still outside the house and there was a lot of air here but why was it so hard for me to breathe. My chest feels so tight.

“Your brother was given land, but that doesn't mean he has it. Had you been near your aunt when she died, that legacy would have been yours. From the beginning, it was yours, Daniel. I'll take care of everything.”

Right now, my eyes are hot and my throat is hurting.I want to cry to hear my mother say that to Daniel, as if I were nowhere near him.

Aunt in addition to bequeathing you her home, she also bequeathed me plantation lands in three cities. Since the time when my aunt started talking about inheritance, I always refused her but my aunt sincerely told me that if she would not give it to Daniel or my mother, she insisted on passing it on to me. That's one of the reasons my mom's getting upset with me.

I remember vividly, aunt told me that when the time came for everything to be mine, I could not sell it for the benefit of Daniel and Mother. I have to wear it when I really need it.

Aunt Rose, I miss you so much. Aunty always stood in front of me if Mom had nagged like this. Auntie loves me very much.

“Look at how your future husband looks like. Although he was not very handsome, his business was strong and he would inherit his grandfather's company. I think she's fit to be my daughter-in-law.” And now mom suddenly showed me a picture of a glasses guy from her phone. I tried to hold back my tears. I always had to be strong against a mother like this.

“Bu, I have not thought about getting married! Anyway I want to marry the person I love and love me.”

“What are you talking about? Are you saying you can't live the way you want because of me?” Mom yelled at me loudly, feeling offended. But I mean not like that.

TAKKS..

Suddenly the lights around the house turned off. The three of us looked at each other and I checked the other house. The house around us the lights are still on, why is it just Mom's house that all the lights are off? What don't-don't—

“Bu, Do you not pay for electricity? The money I give you every month including electricity cost how??”

In the dimness of the night, I saw the restless mother's gesture. I can guess what will be answered.

“Oh, I completely forgot. What should I do?”

“I sent that money to you!”

“U—uang? Mom spent it all. Your sister's been facing a trial these past few months. I don't want to stress her out and have enough nutrition. So mom spent the money for her— bought meat, painted her room and bought some new furniture.”

“BU!! How can you like this—electricity is very important.” Daniel screeched angrily towards mother, I who already did not know what to say just sighed. Trying to regulate my emotions that already want to explode.

Unbeknownst to them, my tears had already fallen down my cheeks. I don't know what else to say. Mom's always been like this, but I'm always not used to it. Even though I know what mother nature is, still my chest is always claustrophobic with her.

“I'll pay for the electricity tomorrow.” I turned around to leave.

“Ka! How light—“

“You just buy candles!!” I squealed angrily cutting into Daniel's words as I started riding my bike.

“Yeah! Can you watch your mother and sister sleep in a dark house like this? What if we rob—“

“So what do you want mom?!” I feel tired of facing everything. I don't know what else to think.

.

..

…

Uhuk uhuk..

“You all right? what if I take you to the nearest hospital or clinic.”

“Uhuk.. no need, thank you. This is enough.” I showed you a packet of medicine that I just bought. Several times the pharmacist on duty tonight approached me and asked me how I was doing.

I am currently sitting in a pharmacy to buy some vitamins and fresh water if the shortness of breath I feel is prolonged. My hands shook and my breathing was so tight after I left Mom and Daniel to stay at the hotel tonight.

This one year I've always been like this after dealing with Mom. Sometimes I would cry sobbing and end up feverishly deflected the day. Maybe this is my lowest point, and tonight it happened again.

I didn't go to college today, I couldn't come by my circumstances. All this time I've been trying to stand up to all kinds of mother nature. All I know is, no matter how hard I try to make ends meet, it's still in mom's eyes, I'm not a filial child.

I wish I could be stronger, but over time it's been hard. I can pretend like I'm happy when I'm sad. For mom I can pretend like I'm strong when I'm hurt.

I hope love is perfect as love itself. And I hope all this weakness can be hidden.

I stepped out walking towards the motorbike I parked, then immediately put on a helmet and rode it. I want to go home and sleep. At least sleep can make me forget everything for a moment.

“You again?! What are you doing here?” I reflexively braked suddenly right in front of the gate of the house when I saw a man in black skinny pants and his moss green jacket covering his entire body. This time Bayu did not wear a hat like 2 days ago.

“I promised to come again today. Have you started forgetting because I don't matter to you anymore, hm?”

I don't know what to answer, of course it's not entirely true. I forgot because of the incident with Mom and hey he is still the man I secretly always miss.

“Why are you daydreaming like this?” Bayu was right in front of my face, I reflexively held my breath when our noses were only a few cents away. Then he pulled himself up and stood looking at me with an expression as if he knew what was happening.

“So—this beautiful girl is crying? Who made you cry?”

“What?! No!”

“Heard answer ‘Ya’ for me. Women are always like that, when they say No, it means Yes. When they answer it is up to reason they are angry.”

I took off the helmet so I could look at him in annoyance. “So this one master already understands women very well, huh? You must have dealt with women a lot!”

“No. I realize this little thing from you. And again just as information I'm not having an affair, all these years I've been very focused on my job at the military camp after you sent me that dropout message.”

I snorted as if I could not answer his words. I don't know my brain feels so dead-end thinking about this debate.

Suddenly I felt Bayu's right hand patting the top of my head slowly. I looked up with a sharp look.

Instead of getting rid of her hands, Bayu laughed and rubbed the side of my head. “Tonight go to bed early, you can sleep better if you drink warm drinks first. I know how you. This beautiful girl will not easily tell what happened to her.”

His pure speech without any of these ignorant gazes calmed me a little. I sank into the softness of that gaze and the gesture of his hands that had not yet come off rubbed my head. He looks more mature now.

“Maybe I can't save it for you but I'm here to always support you.”

“Since when is a Bayu good at sweet words?”

Bayu pulled his hand then chuckled softly. Then what happened next suddenly Bayu stepped closer and hugged me without warning. She had her hands around her shoulders and I felt her chin on top of my head.

The combination of the fragrance of fresh perfume with the smell of mint that emanates from his body can make me sculpt for a moment. His heart is beating faster and I am very nervous right now. The smell of his body is still the same. The perfume selection has not changed.

I wasn't trying to get rid of him, nor was I trying to return his embrace. I'm like a fool who doesn't know what to do.

“After I return, let's talk more seriously about everything.” Bayu let go of his embrace and held both of my shoulders. I always liked her attitude like this, she never hesitated to look at me directly.

I stared back at him with a confused look asking the meaning of his words about returning. “Do you not know I am—“

“No! Just stop! Don't tell me!” I screeched quickly, for the time being it's better I don't know what his position is other than just a soldier. I'm sure this guy has an important position now.

But before everything is clear, about how I feel and our better decisions I don't know.

Bayu seemed to understand from my gaze. He exhaled slowly and nodded.

I just realized how close and understanding we were to each other. With just a look despite not speaking, we seemed to know what we were thinking and what we should do.

God, why is everything getting so complicated. I just wanted to make him go away but he came back with all his charm and affection.

TINN..

The sound of honking and the light of the lights shifted our eyes. A luxurious black car drove over and stopped not far from our position.

I looked back at Bayu who was also looking at me. He smiled slightly then again patted the top of my head a few times before saying.

“Good. I went.”

This time I pegged more and more at the spot as Bayu peeked at the side of my head at a glance and the man passed by leaving me towards his pickup car just like that.

I glanced at him with an annoyed and irritated expression. After she stole a hug, and now she kisses me. You land crocodile man!!

Before Bayu got into the car, he turned to look at me with a big laugh because it managed to piss me off.

Tsk!!

Bayu never let me live a quiet life without resentment towards him every time we met.

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