EMBRACE YOU: Presence & Poison
Episode 54

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Bayu held his head up, his eyelids opened and he was looking at me, waiting for my next speech. “I never thought about having a night without falling asleep, it was true, not a lie and it would make me stronger. Then what is love? If there is an answer, I want to know right now. I'm down, I can see the light in that crumble, in the darkness of the night, the dawn is coming.”

I felt his hand rub the top of my head. Like I haven't felt it in a long time.

“There is beauty in everything, it's just that not everyone sees it.” He said, I reflexively looked at him who was also looking at me with his soft eyes.

“When I close my eyes, in the darkness there is your light. We can keep going without fear. Decide for yourself what happiness means. Every day we take steps to grow up. But it doesn't matter sometimes showing your weakness, it's okay to be yourself. Don't lie to yourself again, hm?”

My vision was already blurry, my eyes were heating up and my throat was hurting withstanding the crying. I didn't want to cry in front of him but Bayu's words seemed to wake me up if I didn't have to always wear a mask. I also have to step forward and get out of my slump.

He encouraged me and fully allowed me to freely think and decide. The implied message from his eyes indicated that he would be there for me.

Unable to stand it, I smiled at her and felt a drop of tears fall down my cheek. I should have been more grateful to have this man by my side. He always fought for his love for me. But I don't feel like I've fought enough for it all this time. I just ran away like a coward.

“I love you.”

Both Bayu's eyes widened to hear my words. I chuckled softly while rubbing my cheek. My eyes just keep going

shed tears. The combination of the tightness in my chest cavity and the presence of Bayu made my heart beat fast.

“You still have a fever. You better take a break before our flight in a few hours.” I held the hand of Bayu who tried to pull me up. He sat down next to me with a worried look.

“I'm sorry. I haven't fought for you enough. I was just thinking about how I felt.”

Bayu shook his head slowly, grasped my hands tightly and answered. “Love is about our commitment, patience, and trust in the person we feel is right for us. I wait when I miss you every day. There are so many feelings I have for you that I have to let go, to be at a level where the arrangement cannot return to its original form. Just leave it and don't cry.”

I was getting sobbing slowly hearing it. I closed my eyes with my right hand, hoping that this tightness would disappear.

“I'll be waiting for you, let's start all over again. So I can see you again with a smile.” Said gently.

I remember this afternoon, when Bayu pulled me. He didn't smile at me at all. He even ignored me.

“Even through a hundred years, as long as afterwards I can walk with you. I'm doing fine. Can I be yours?” His words made my heart beat so fast, I was afraid that Bayu would hear it.

He looked at me very seriously. His fingers rubbed my cheeks. Remove the tears from there. This sincere warmth, may it last forever. “I don't have enough words, I'll say what it is. Can I touch your heart? I want you to believe, I will definitely get you.”

Those words just flowed from my mouth. His sincerity touched my heart. He gave her his love. She made me the luckiest girl in the world.

This man looked at me afterwards, exhaled his breath and nodded slowly. “Since long ago, a busy day, I kept busy myself, to distract me, I filled my schedule. But I can't forget you, as if your name has been engraved and stuck in my heart like a tattoo.”

I chuckled softly at the answer. I slightly pushed my head away from both of his hands,

my face was heating up in embarrassment and of course I didn't want Bayu to realize that.

“I'll tell it.”

“What?”

“The reason I decided on you first.”

Bayu looked at me seriously, he was quietly waiting for me to speak. “But before that, please don't pity me, hm?”

This man nodded slowly, tilting his sitting position to be more comfortable looking at me. I awakened

my back is on the back of this wooden chair. Exhaling slowly and close the blanket that had been coiling around my shoulder. I was nervous about having to face him to tell him about my problem, so I just stared ahead, at the star-studded sky.

Then it all just flowed when I told her how mom and dad divorced when I was six because I knew you were having an affair and told you. Dad blames me for being too chatty, and then mom changed

She always blamed me for whatever happened, mother also demanded a lot of things one of them about money until when I graduated high school I was afraid Bayu would be used by mother, she said, considering that my mother used my boyfriend during Junior High and not even rarely my friends too, until those who can't stand to stay away from me.

Finally I chose to stay away and busy myself with work and college activities. Until I finally found out that Daniel was the one who had been paying for school until college, I paid all his investment debts that he himself hired someone to make me suffer.

Bayu listened to me without interrupting. He looked at me without taking his eyes off me since. Look at my face from the side. My body was too tired and wanted to rest but could not. I know my eyes are very cute, want to be closed but my brain seems to keep working and do not want to rest. That's why I can't cry anymore when I tell you all about it.

“So that bad? But she's a birth mother—“

“I don't think.” I cut Bayu's speech.

“I just heard lately. Mom accidentally said that I was Aunt Rose's stepdaughter, that person

attention to me and who bequeathed all his possessions to me. Which makes mom and dad fight over it. Maybe that's why Daniel bought poison to make me suffer. Maybe he knew from the beginning if I wasn't his sister.”

“Have you found out the truth about your mother's last words?”

“Not yet. Actually after our fight the last time I wasn't home, I was on work and college leave.

I-” I stopped my speech, glancing at Bayu at a glance. He seemed to be frowning waiting for my answer.

Should I say that too? The matter about my family alone embarrassed me when faced with this man. Moreover, if he knew that I was sick, would he stay away from me and leave me? But, ever since deciding to tell me about this, I've known that I believe it.

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