Behind The Lies
You Shouldn't be Here

Ashilla placed the items next to the bed.

“Sus, this is Ashilla who will be Lily's adoptive mother,” Iyash told sister Rika, the woman who became a permanent nurse at her grandfather's orphanage.

Ashilla smiled.

“This is Sister Rika who will take care of Lily,” Iyash told Ashilla.

There were many things Iyash had planned, but none of Ashilla knew.

“Where to drink milk?”

“Current, Bu.”

“Sgratitude.” Ashilla sat next to the sleeping baby. "His mother's pity has not seen the baby she's had for nine months."

Sister Rika just smiled. While Iyash did not stop looking at the woman who kept reminding him of his first love.

“Yash. Should you find a home for Sister Rika and Lily?”

Iyash seemed to think. “We chat on the balcony.” The man went straight outside and Ashilla quickly got up.

“There are snacks for sister Rika,” Ashilla said before leaving.

“Still, Bu.”

“Sama-sama, if you need anything, do not hesitate to say to me.”

Sister Rika nodded. Ashilla followed Iyash to the balcony. When he landed his ass on the couch enjoying the almost dim blue light, he reached for his cell phone and texted his mother in New York.

[Bund, I miss Asa.] The sentence was sent, however, of course the message was not immediately read, let alone get a reply because it was still early in the morning, while Ashilla himself was enjoying the afternoon before night.

Suddenly, she missed her only child as soon as she entered Lily's room a moment ago.

“So you think mending find home?” ask Iyash while sitting down.

Ashilla blinked and quickly put the phone on the table. “Iya. Let me go free. Because it looks like your mom doesn't like me.”

“Sorry, if your attitude makes you uncomfortable.”

Ashilla nodded. "Why do you want to be Lily's foster father?”

“Pengen aja, indeed why? Weird?"

Ashilla feels weird. "Why didn't you just have a child?"

“I don't need a partner,” replied Iyash.

“Bogged," snorted Ashilla while throwing away face. Suddenly Iyash's crisp voice sounded and it left him flabbergasted.

“If it's not the same him, better me alone.”

“Iya, ‘kan?” ask Ashilla to make sure.

Iyash was still silent and it seemed that Ashilla had stopped fretting about what Iyash did not want to say. “Ah! Sorry.”

Iyash let out a long sigh and it made Ashilla feel that what Iyash was going through was so heavy. Slowly the man moved from his seat. “I'll get you a drink.” Then left without seeing if Ashilla nodded or not.

As Iyash went to fetch water, Ashilla circulated the gaze all over and she was glued to a room, the door opened a little, she felt very curious, she slowly pushed the door and peeked a little.

Ashilla was flabbergasted because the room was so beautiful. Not because it is filled with white ornaments and white furniture, but there are other things that make it more interested. The room is more like a work space because of the desk and chairs. Slowly Ashilla stepped in, somehow she could not control her curiosity, so she forgot that she had crossed the line.

The white woman was stunned to see a photo of a woman in a white dress who turned her back to the camera while guiding a bicycle. Another photo shows a woman wearing a caping and picking tea. Then there are pictures of Iyash with some friends at High School. While other photos make him stunned because the women in the photos Iyash very similar to him.

His heart was racing because he looked like he was seeing himself in the pictures. On another wall he saw a painting of a woman who again looked so much like him that he felt that it was indeed himself from another dimension.

His breathing was a little hunting, his heart was pounding, slowly spinning as he continued to stare at the photos. Suddenly his heart slashed when he saw Iyash was behind him.

“Yash.” Ashilla gasped in retreat. “Sorry, I–” He again circulated the view as if he could not believe what he had just seen. The photos that were attached to the wall and attached to the frame made him feel that Iyash was indeed very obsessed with the woman named Aruna.

“No you should be here.” The man quickly retreated and moved away from Ashilla. Ashilla's heart gripped seeing Iyash away from her. “Now you go!”

“Yash, but–” Ashilla is approaching instead.

“Go!” shout Iyash.

The woman sighed, this time her tears trickled down her cheeks. “I'm sorry.”

“Out!”

Ashilla's crying. He looked back at the photos, especially the photo of Aruna smiling towards the camera. Ashilla didn't lie that she felt like she was looking in the mirror.

Iyash got angry and pulled her out. “Other times never cross the line!”

Ashilla was flabbergasted as Iyash let go of his hand grip on the doorstep. The man looked at her for a long time, then entered into a room that looked more like the photo gallery. Ashilla looked sad as she knocked on the door. “Yash, I'm sorry,” he said full of guilt.

Ashilla should have realized one thing that she was a nobody. He and Iyash just happened to be met in a situation and brought close because of an incident. It's not that he's free to do what he shouldn't.

Slowly Ashilla left the house. He dragged his feet towards the parked car in front of the house. He got in the car and cried there. A shadow of the photos revolved like a butut cassette.

The smile of happiness between Iyash and Aruna continued to overshadow his thoughts. Ashilla took a mirror and saw the image of her face there. Why is her face so similar to Aruna's? Iyash just kept calling him that.

Ashilla touched her own cheeks, her fingers touched her eyes, then went down to her nose and landed on her lips. “Who am I?” muttered. Suddenly he felt he did not know himself.

For people with borderline personalities like himself, of course, it becomes a big question. Why is there a person who looks like him, while all this time he does not know himself very well.

“Ashilla Wijaya, or Aruna Anastasya?” mumbling back. He sighed and both his eyes closed for a long time. In the darkness between the serenity he found two female figures facing each other with their eyes closed to each other, but when they opened their eyes Ashilla screamed.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, continuing over and over until he felt quite calm. After that he turned the wheel and went to drive the car leaving the yard of Iyash's house. Although Aruna's shadow continued to incarnate in his mind, Ashilla tried hard to pull it aside.