Behind The Lies
Stop Lying to Yourself

Iyash returns to Ganjar's house to meet Aruna. He hoped this time to be able to talk a lot with the woman. However, again he failed, which he met that night was precisely Ashilla.

“Bi Sumi said you were here this morning?” ask Ashilla while sitting down.

“Iya. All depart for work.” Iyash sat down, then spread his gaze.

“And now come home from work you are here again, why?”

“I want to see Aruna.”

“What else do you want?”

“Why?” Iyash's forehead frowned. “Why can't I see him?” tanya Iyash goiter.

“Not, but you should spare Aruna, sincere her, Yash.”

“Ten years I've been waiting for him,” said Iyash convincingly. “Why at the end of my wait, I should forget him.”

“But, he's married, Yash,” Ashilla said. “The man you met this morning, that's her husband,” Ashilla said.

Iyash was stunned, his heart rumbled. “You lied. He must have told you to lie, ‘kan?”

“Iya. He told me to lie and cover everything up, but now I'm honest. I feel sorry for you, Yash.”

Iyash. Then shake. He's still trying to deny everything.

Ashilla sighed. “I'm sure you actually know that you can't have him anymore.”

Iyash.

“Yash. I beg. Live and live your life normally. You deserve something more.”

Iyash shook his head again, his eyes watering. “Until this second I am still convinced that Aruna was created for me, Shill,” Iyash said stammeringly.

Ashilla. He patted Iyash on the shoulder with a smile. “Stop lying to yourself. I'm sure you don't completely forget.”

Iyash was getting bowed and could no longer hold the dam in his eyes. Slowly then he nodded. “Actually before I have met Aruna in Germany, exactly–” Iyash seemed to think. “Five years ago. She is celebrating her birthday with a man.”

Ashilla's heart is beating. “So why should you lie to yourself if you already know everything?”

Iyash patted the forehead. “My head is like breaking every time I remember it.”

“Terus Aruna know?”

Iyash.

“You should have said.”

“That's impossible, Shill.”

“You know that five years ago, so why do you still expect him?”

“But, suddenly you came, Shill,” said Iyash switched the conversation.

“And you know I'm not Aruna,” Ashilla said. He doesn't mind if Iyash doesn't answer his question.

Iyash. “I've found out all the first time I saw you.”

“Keep why should you pretend?”

Iyash fell silent and gave no answer. Ashilla clucked while throwing her face.

“You're angry when I know your obsession.”

“You mean?”

“If you really think of me as Aruna, you shouldn't be angry when I see those photos, yes, ‘kan? Unfortunately you know that I'm not her, so you're angry, let alone I see photos of Aruna who is in Germany displayed in your room.”

Iyash's heart is beating. “You're right,” I'm that guy.

Ashilla smiled as the man admitted his accusation.

Iyash wetting the throat. “Today I met Aruna at the restaurant. I was almost crazy for fear of losing her again, but, I should have realized that Aruna did not come alone.”

Of course because Iyash had collided with Faran at the restaurant.

Ashilla took a breath. “Faran is Aruna's psychiatrist. He's the one who helped Aruna through it all.”

Iyash lifted his face and looked at Ashilla. “And help him forget me?” guess the guy.

Ashilla shook her head. “Not help forget, but help her accept everything that happened.”

Iyash. “You think I can't help Aruna get through it all?”

“I believe you can. Aruna often stories how you gave a lot of color in her life.”

Iyash smiled knot.

“But this time is different, Yash.” Ashilla tilted her face and looked at the man. “When we were close to earning a bachelor's degree in paternity health deteriorated, that time Faran also helped take care of dad. That's when maybe he expressed his good intentions who wants to marry Aruna.”

Iyash's chest was like being hit by a heavy object. “Aruna received the man because she also loved him, ‘kan?”

Ashilla shook her head. “Aruna never refused the wedding, Yash. She said that her heart was stuck in you.”

Immediately Iyash straightened his body and stared at Ashilla without blinking.

Iyash took a breath. He came back down to quell his disappointment. “Why should Mr Ridwan give such a message?” mumbling Iyash.

“Why, Yash?” ashilla asked as she tilted her head and looked at the man.

Iyash quickly shook his head.

Ashilla re-stretched her body. “I've also heard that your mother doesn't approve of you, ‘kan? Aruna chose to retreat because she was not destined to fight against blessing. He's too weak to do that.”

Iyash stared at the floor. Maybe Ashilla has a point.

“If Aruna alone can give up why don't you, Yash?”

“But why should I give up if I'm still in Aruna's heart?” Iyash asked, raising his face and looking at Ashilla.

“It was. Seven years Aruna lived with Faran. How many times do you think the guy calms her down when she's sad? How many times has he hugged and touched her? Do you think he'll hold on to his all-round feelings?” Ashilla then shook her head. “I'm sure not, Yash. Love can come because of comfort.”

Iyash's chest tight. “If that is so, why doesn't Aruna herself meet me and say it?”

“He won't be as calm as I deliver,” said Ashilla confidently.

Iyash.

“If not angry, he will cry. And you know who can keep Aruna stable?”

Immediately Iyash's heart melted.

“Faran,” connect Ashilla.

Iyash expected it.

“First love is not always beautiful.” Ashilla pats Iyash on the shoulder.

Iyash. All was wide open as Ashilla said the bitter thing quite calmly and used a good sentence.

“Gkasa is lucky to have you,” said Iyash in the end.

Ashilla smiled. “I'm the lucky one to have Space. You know, Asa's father was also my first love. I think Aruna and I are fateful. Both can not be united with first love.”

Iyash smiled bitterly. “Thank you for all your time. Sorry for our first meeting, sorry for all the time ever seized because of me.”

“It’s okay.” Ashilla smiled.

“Trauma who is in the pool it–?”

“Iya,” said Ashilla, “aku with Aruna turned out to have one similar incident and finally we were both afraid of drowning.” Ashilla shook her head. “Too.”

“That once made me sure that you were him.”

Ashilla smiled. “Now stop lying to yourself. Aruna will also be happy to see you can move on. Open your heart because if you still survive with the past, you will not be able to receive new love.”

This time Iyash smiled. “Kayak song.”

“But true, ‘kan?”

Iyash. He then got up. “Still, Shill. You have opened my mind.”

Ashilla also got up. “You also opened my mind.” A second later he laughed. “But, actually not really, I want to go to college again is really, so that I can find reasons so that I do not need to take care of the company Opa.”

“Oh, which one?” Iyash. “I don't remember.”

Ashilla was silent for a few seconds. “Ya lupain aja,” said the woman while scratching her head. Either Iyash was honest or not, but he obviously had to close this conversation immediately.

Iyash nodded, then reached out his hand. Ashilla welcomed him kindly. “Ashilla.”

“Iyash.”

The two then laughed.

“I go home, afraid Angkasa misunderstood.” Iyash took a step towards the door that had been wide open.

“Ngaklah. Now Space is not jealous.”

Iyash. “Thank God. I pray you guys last until grandpa, granny.”

“Aamiin.”

“I'm sorry, Shill. Assalamualaikum.”

“Waalaikumsalam.”

Iyash turned around and took another step back.

On the doorstep Ashilla smiled looking at the man's back, she then shouted. “Happy to know you, Yash.”

Iyash stopped stepping and smiled, then turned his head. “I also.”

Ashilla waved and Iyash replied.

Iyash got into the car and was about to dart away. However, his eyes were held back on Ashilla who was still standing in front of the porch of the Ganjar house. It seems Iyash has mistakenly pretended to stay in love with Aruna, even though the last few months there are different things that he feels for Ashilla. She admitted that Ashilla was a sweet and cheerful woman. Aruna is not like that. The Aruna she knew was a cold woman, rarely speaking and smiling a little.

***