Roses Are Not in Love
Broken down.

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The clock ticked ten times and by this time I was tidy with our navy suit and uniform. Back my hand justifies the rectangular hijab that I let dangle down without the frills of the brooch when back past the mirror in front of the room, then switch to reach my shoes arranged in front of the room door.

Sunginggan a faint smile for a second framed my lips, as soon as I remembered where I was going. And for what purpose I went. Then I pull my feet lightly down the stairs one by one with the wishful thinking soaring.

"Where to. Don't be long, we'll take the train." Said Bia as soon as she passed me at the end of the stairs.

"Yes already know. I'm just a little less than two hours, I promise." Answer to Bia.

Bia reversed her steps which are now following me. "Where the hell are you. Fragrant, neat, beautiful, happy anyway." Cerocos Bia was just as I was about to sit down to put on my shoes.

"It's not that happy it's mandatory."Timpalku while wearing my shoes.

"But, if it's suspicious happy I need to follow."

"I'm sorry, I'm not looking for a nyah ojek." I reply with a smile that makes Bia flick her lips towards me and it just makes my smile widened.

"Calm down, Bi. I'll be back soon, it won't be long. It's just, I can't take you. Here no sun." I continued without caring about Bia and immediately kissed her cheek and then stepped towards the door.

"Dihh, it's like your kiss is too expensive. It's a look not swiped until it's left." Bia answered with her face made sok kelas even though from the corner of her lips was smiling. "Awas go home later even cry if the happy is mysterious that is." Bia continued again when I reached the door.

"Oh, I'm afraid of what Ms Nyai would say." Candaku while blinking my eyes then immediately walked out the door of the Dormitory and did not hear again what was said by Bia.

Leaving the Pesantren gate, I chose to walk slowly through the sidewalk to find a shady place to stop the angkot. And it didn't take long, the angkot that I was waiting for finally came too, then took me to leave Pesantren towards the city center.

Half an hour drive finally arrived at the terminal that I was headed, and rushed to the place that Mas Karang had told me via text last night. It was also repeated about ten minutes ago, when I called to ask where I was.

I don't know what got into it, so it looks like Mas Karang is very impatient waiting for my arrival. Mas Karang just said that it was good news for him and I was the one who was invited to share his happiness.

My steps finally arrived at a clean white painted caffe. Right in front of the glass door there is a flower Melati Irian that is shade from the sun so that the atmosphere is without beautiful. Keeping my feet deeper, the first sight I encountered was the homey concept once the large glass door was shifted and immediately encountered the receptionist table as well as love at the end of the room.

"Good day, welcome. Is there anything we can help you with.?" Ask one of the servants kindly to me.

"Good afternoon. I'm looking for dr.Corrent." My answer is in accordance with the words of Mas Karang to directly mention his name.

"With Brother Rose.?" Ask the waiter.

"Yes right."

"Let me deliver." He said, inviting me to follow in his footsteps.

Climb to the second floor, my eyes are spoiled with a place that is quite good for young people, also of course good to meet the gallery. Proceed to the third floor my eyes are increasingly gaping, because the concept is in the outdoor. Some umbrellas that bloom on the edge of the fence add to the contemporary impression.

And it didn't take long to circulate my gaze in order to admire this place, there was something much more that caught my attention. Yep, of course he is sitting with a cellphone stuck to his ear. Whether this is a coincidence or indeed telepathy that occurs, because Mas Karang is also wearing a Navy warrant shirt as well.

After being thanked, I stepped closer to Mas Karang who was still busy with his postel, then immediately smiled meaningfully as soon as I stood in front of him. Without making a sound Mas Karang told me to sit down and still focus on listening to his phone.

"Not necessary, Dad. You don't have to use connections, I'm more proud of this. Just tell Mom not to miss me too much when I'm far away. Yeah, I'm there's someone." Mas Karang said still with his sweet smile towards me.

"not yet. Yes, it is, Assalamu'alaikum." Say Mas Karang again and soon after immediately put his phone on the table.

Mas Karang did not immediately say, instead propping up his chin intensely looking at me, while I who got such a gaze from him was not more confused and busy tidying up even to rub my face repeatedly.

"Why, is there something wrong with my face.?" I was confused, because it had been almost five minutes Mas Karang was still cool to keep silent by continuing to look at me.

"Bangetpus. You've got a lot of fault." Mas Karang replied slowly and still did not want to turn his gaze away from me. It worked to make me uncomfortable and sit unsettled.

"Let's not a little rose." Say Mas Karang again. And without a second thought I followed his words shifting my body slightly to the left side.

"Emm, try a little bit to the right." Mas Karang. Again I just follow the direction of Mas Karang without knowing the meaning, and so on until several times I moved his position still nothing is right.

"Coral Mas why the hell." My protest.

"Search for the right. Ehh, it turns out that nothing really fits, too late all." Answer Mas Karang relaxed.

I shrugged my shoulders confused by Mas Karang's words. "What's missing.?" Tanyaku.

"Beautiful." Bluss, hearing Mas Karang's answer my cheek immediately flushed and reflexively I threw Mas Karang with a tissue in front of me.

"I don't believe it. I swear, you are beautiful today. Especially wearing a Navy hijab. Make your brother's heart melt, Dekk.." Mas Karang replied more and more ngaco.

"Buck...." My protest, but only one long word.

"What Dekkk.."

"Mas Karang, stop making jokes. I have something serious to talk about." I said it quickly to cover up my embarrassment.

"Anything." My answer.

"Emm, you choose. Let me follow you." Mas Karang thrust a menu book at me.

"It's not that the woman is following the man." I said in a word while giggling.

"Related, so.?"

"It depends on whether you follow it or not." This time my face was really red.

"If I told you to wait another two years, would you follow me.?" I look at the face of Mas Karang who now looks serious.

"I got a scholarship for a specialist in the dream town, Roses. It took less than two years. So, are you going to wait for me." I froze for a moment with the words of Mas Karang, as well as remembering the words of Bu Mega last night as well as the answer I gave to Bu Mega that I wanted to talk to Mas Karang.

"Say, you will wait for me, Rose." Pinta Mas Karang by pulling one hand in his clutches.

Warm and full of hand protection Mas Karang for a moment made me forget the land that it is a sin. And as soon as our gazes met, a hope was clearly drawn in his eyes. However, it was only for a moment, because Kak Melati's shadow also Adit mingled into one in my mind. Should I be selfish..?

"Rose, say something." Say Mas Karang again.

Actually I am very embarrassed if I have to say this to Mas Karang, but I have no choice but to try and put my pride for a moment for selfishness so that this self is happy.

"Will you come to the house that gives me shade and gives clarity to this relationship.?" Slowly, finally the word came out as well and it was clear that the shocked face of Mas Karang.

I could have guessed before, it's just that I was too confident with all the sweet words Mas Karang. And with the silence of Mas Karang I already know, that I am not the ultimate goal of his love journey.

"I'm not ready, Rose. I still want to pursue my mind. But, really if you want to wait two years. I promise I'll propose to you." Said Mas Karang by increasing the grip of his hand.

"Maybe I'll be able to wait till now, but not with my family. Because I take the favor of them."

"Explain to them that I'm not ready. That I'm still pursuing my mind."

I breathed deeply and then pulled my hand slowly from the grasp of Mas Karang. "If there's no way behind me to confront them, I can't." Overshipped.

"To be with that I must have something first, Rose. What I have today still has my parents."

"I don't need to have, I just need to come to the house and name this relationship. So, one day if someone stresses something from me I already have a name from sampean." Answer me with a trembling tone. It has broken my pest veins, until I dare to force it on Mas Karang.

"I can't just ignore it. Especially considering that two months ago you were sick and not an ordinary pain, I will not.."

"I'll just be a burden.." I'm lirih.

"It's not like that I mean, Roses. Please understand, I'm just not ready mentally and financially."

"Then, I'm sorry. I also have no reason to wait till then." I stood up and turned around quickly, because my eyes were already very hot.

"Roses, don't be like this. Please think again." Mas Karang stood looming in front of me to prevent my move.

I looked at his sad face, and the same thing must have been seen from my eyes, but I did not want to flinch from my decision, because this is the only way I can use to reject Bu Mega. But, the answer given by Mas Karang actually broke my heart first.

"All girls have dreams that are well respected, come to their homes and in good wishes. I have dreams like that too." I'm lirih. "I can't wait, not because I'm in a hurry. But, because I was shaken by circumstances. If I approved two years from now, it would be the same as cheating myself. I'm sorry I can't, so it'd be better if it all turned out today." I said with my chest torn to shreds.

"We have a day a night to think. I'll be waiting for you tomorrow afternoon at the city terminal." Mas Karang finally gave up and let me go.

Going with a feeling I never imagined would hurt this much. It turned out like this it felt heartbroken, broken because of my own actions. Did I not know before that every heart that is leaning apart from Allah, the pain that is much worse will be received. And I am currently receiving that reward. Thankful to those who are patient in the ordinance of God. Then Allah made his heart happy with the beauty of his destiny.

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By: Ariz Coffee

@maydina862