STEADFASTNESS OF LOVE
Fuckup

"Fathan, there's a lot I want to ask you, whether this is a doubt or a reason for rejection. One thing is for sure, I want to end the turmoil in my heart. I don't want to keep you waiting for my imperfect self. I want all my heart's questions answered. So I can be sure of my race for you and I believe you exist for me. With all my imperfections!" said Annisa softly, while staring at the open ocean. Fathan nodded while looking at Annisa. He looked at the veiled woman who had disturbed his heart. Fathan is not attracted to the beauty of the face. Both clear eyes are full of faith. Eyes that only see what is lawful to him? The faith of a wajita who becomes the foundation of a man looking for the true meaning of the afterlife.

After returning from the pesantren, Fathan's car crashed on the high seas. The Faiq's car was driven from behind. Upon arrival by the sea, Annisa immediately walked towards the beach. Fathan asks Faiq to wait around the mobi instead of in the car. Because Davina's asleep. Maybe because of the influence of the drugs given by Faiq. Fathan moved away from Faiq and Davina. While Faiq stood leaning on the front body of his car. He couldn't have been in the car with Davina. But he also could not have left Davina alone in the car. Although the weather was very hot, Faiq chose to stay outside the car.

"Say all your heart. Express all your doubts to me. I came to see you this morning. Not to convince yourself or force yourself to accept me. Last night I made up my mind, whatever your decision I will accept. My race for you should not be avenged. But my race for you must not harm others. So I decided to find the end of this taste. So that my race does not destroy the relationship between Faiq and Davina. They deserve to be happy, and so do you. You deserve a better man than me!" said Fathan, Annisa looked down at the white sand and the ripples of the waves that touched his feet. The gameplay is wet due to sea water. Fathan stared fixedly at Annisa. The one who taught Fathan love. He will also inflict a deep wound on Fathan.

"I never understood your way of thinking, thinking there would be love for a woman like me. I have been living alone and independent all this time. I feel like there will be no love in my life. I dedicate my life to being a doctor. Not looking for love, but I want to give love to my patients. I am comfortable with all the love around me. Until I meet you. You made me dream of a beautiful love. A relationship that sounds very happy. Change my mind about a love that is never holy and everlasting. A taste that is impermanent and devastating. So I have to live in a broken family. Life without the love of a mother. When I found a mother's love. Again and again I was hurt. I had to go away, because the affection I missed hurt another mother's heart. I live without the love of a family. Now you come offering love over real differences. Our age is far away. Our character and character are different. It will not be easily fused, even if your heart decides that I am chosen. My heart now wants to be with you, but my thoughts and memories seem to scare me from getting hurt!" annisa said, she looked down to remember that life was very difficult for her.

Fathan saw Annisa's body shake. There was the sound of sobbing cries. Fathan could not see Annisa's tears. A perfectly closed sadness behind the veil. Fathan feels guilty, his love does not make Annisa happy but hurt. Annisa is afraid of being tied up in marriage. Trauma of Naufal's failed marriage. Makes Annisa not believe in the sacredness of love.

"Fathan, you've turned my world into a complicated one. Now I'm just thinking about you. There's a sense of wanting to be with you. My life used to be comfortable without knowing love. But now I'm happy, but I'm afraid of losing you. I smile every time I receive your attention. I'm nervous not to see how you are. Maybe I'm starting to love you, but I'm afraid of pain. I don't want to feel the joy of love. A second later I cried for love. Call me a coward, but that's me. My bath was just to cover my fear. My cold holds an unbrimmed sense of loneliness. I kept my face behind the veil, so that no one would be lured to the pseudo-beauty within me. But your determination seems to say. It's not the pretty face that ties you to me. But the beauty of my heart, an imperfect woman full of weakness. From you I feel love, understand the meaning of love. Your figure is always teasing my bow. Now the priest I never imagined. In your form, I miss your guidance!" annisa said softly, Annisa squeezed her long robe. His long hijab was waving in the wind. The sound of the waves was like the voice of Annisa's heart. Full of anxiety without any calm.

"Annisa Maulida Zahro, I'm sorry if my presence tormented you. I never thought. My race will make you restless and remember your past. Truthfully far from the bottom of my heart, I was more and more amazed after hearing your heart. You are always silent to keep all the suffering. You smile even though your heart is quiet and silent. Now I'll tell you all my simple thoughts about love!" said Fathan, Annisa turned his head and nodded slowly. Faiq just looked from afar. I wish two lovebirds could find one word in their love.

"If I ask you to choose between me and Mama Hana. Who will you choose?" annisa said softly, Fathan turned his head. He was surprised by Annisa's question.

"I'm going to choose mama, sorry if I have to let you down!" fathan said firmly without much thought. Annisa was silent, thinking Fathan would choose her. Turns out Annisa was wrong, Fathan remains a spoiled man looking for his mother.

"Why Mama Hana? It means you let me go for your parents!"

"I never expected to be in the position of having to choose. But if I had to choose. I'm sorry if I had to choose my mom. Not that I let you go for mama's sake, but with you and hurt you. I really won't be able to. The love I felt for you was true, but my mother's love for me was sincere without asking for anything in return. With you I want to start a holy relationship. But my relationship with my mother is eternal. It was not your hand that I held when I was born, but your hand that led me when I fell. It was your hug that I wanted to feel, but my mother's embrace warmed me all this time. I will never forget an old relationship for a new one. My love is great for you, but your love is worth more than my life. Mama's heaven my hereafter, while with you I want to go to HIS heaven!" said Fathan, Annisa breathed a very long sigh. He looked at Fathan. His gaze met with Fathan, they seemed to express love in the air.

"Make me your makmum. It's a real loss to me to refuse your proposal. A child who values his mother can never hurt his wife. For she understood every drop of a wife's sweat for the good of her husband. Tears flowing for the son. Will make him realize the wife's sacrifice!" annisa said as she opened her veil. Fathan looked up at the face of the future wife.

"Replace the veil, I don't want to see your face. Let the holy love continue. Until I become the priest of your hereafter. Thank you for accepting me!"