STEADFASTNESS OF LOVE
Kiara's Heart Voice

Dusk came to replace the afternoon, the sign of the evening came to replace. The blue sky changed orange, a combination of colors that made the eyes reluctant to blink. The twilight of a natural beauty, the real painting of the DIVINE. The twilight that will always be present tomorrow replaces the afternoon. Bringing new confidence and happiness.

As usual when dusk appeared, Kiara was always present to look at him. Something that has now become the way Kiara let her tired live. Since Kiara was in this pesantren. His parents never visited him. Papa and his mother never came, just asking his condition. There is a longing in the heart for the figure of his parents. Kiara is their only daughter?

Long Kiara silently looked at the twilight. He expressed a longing for his parents. Suddenly he remembered the piece of paper that Rizal had given him. An invitation from Kyai to his boarding school. Kiara is not an innocent girl and does not understand the purpose of the Dalem family invitation to her. With the initial intention that Rizal said, either jokingly or solemnly.

Kiara never expected, if Rizal was able to make it this far. He thought what Rizal said, was just a joke. But he was wrong, Rizal's sincerity was clearly visible from a piece of paper in his hand. A special invitation for him, a meeting in person with the father of Rizal. The leader of the boarding school where he demanded knowledge.

"Kiara, what are you doing here?" greet Rafa, Kiara was silent. His body stiffened hearing the voice of his brother. There was a sense of disbelief and fear what he heard was just a mere delusion? Kiara looked slowly with doubt. When both of his eyes saw the figure of the brother standing not far from him. Kiara immediately stood up, she ran to hug her sanf sister. Although they are not born from the same womb and breast milk. The same blood flows within them. Blood is not easily separated. Even if we try to separate it.

Kiara hugging Rafa vents all the yearning for her family. Forgetting for a moment the uneasiness of his heart. Without Kiara noticing, several pairs of eyes watched. Maybe the longing for his family makes Kiara forget about the surrounding conditions.

Hana stands right next to Rafa. Fathan sleeps in Hana's arms. Rizal, the guide, was moved to see the proximity of Rafa and Kiara. Salwa who accidentally wants to invite Kiara inside. Even see the reality of the closeness of Rafa and Kiara. He was amazed to see the closeness of Rafa and Kiara.

"Aggghhmm, long time brother Hana was jealous to see you hug me like this!" rafa said, Kiara shook her head weakly. Hana hits Rafa's back. Kiara kept tightly hugging Rafa's body. At least Kiara did not care about Rafa's words.

"Sir Rafa, what business is there coming here? Did ustad Rizal say anything?" kiara said shortly after taking off Rafa's embrace. Rafa instantly turned his head in turn towards Rizal and Kiara. As if you know nothing?

"What secret among you do I not know? What is my relationship with Rizal? Tell me clearly, which one of you two will be telling the truth!" cecar Rafa was astonished, Rizal shrugged both his shoulders. Instead Kiara immediately looked down embarrassed. The prejudice is wrong, while Hana understands the direction of Kiara's conversation. Hana smiled happily. He felt that there would be other happiness, besides the development of pesantren.

"Sir Rafa, maybe what Kiara meant. Change in status from friend to sister. If my guess is correct, it means our little Kiara is growing up!" hana said, Rafa turned to Hana. Rizal smiled towards Rafa who looked as if asking. Kiara shook her head weakly without daring to look at Rizal who was beside her.

"What's really going on? You guys are playing riddles, if you don't say it now. Brother is leaving!" said Rafa teasingly as he walked, Kiara pulled Rafa's shirt. When Rafa stops, Hana is more and more convinced that there is something Kiara wants to convey to Rafa.

"Alright, looks like Kiara objected to me being here. I'm leaving first, and tonight I'll meet him at home. Abi Malik wants to meet Kiara in person!" rizal said, Rafa nodded beginning to understand the direction of the conversation. Rizal asks Salwa to also stay away from Kiara. They both walked towards the pesantren.

"Dear Kiara, tell all your anxiety to your sister. Brother Hana enter first, pity Fathan if it's out in a moment magrib. Don't keep something you can't finish. Talk to your brother, consider him a papa substitute. He's your guardian who will protect you. Never hesitate to tell him. Lean on his body, dusk will not answer your question. But your brother will bring your heart's restlessness!" hana said gently while stroking Kiara's head slowly. Hana never had a sister, but with Kiara. Hannah felt like she had a sister. Kiara's restlessness will only be resolved by Rafa. His blood brother who was able to feel the bitterness and pain of Kiara's heart. Only sometimes the brothers understand after being asked.

"Kiara, I won't be able to hate you. For loving Rafa, my husband. The same blood flows within you. Proving you can't be separated. I will be as good a sister-in-law as I can be. Even if you never thought of it. Because your brother values me, I respect you. I've never had a brother, I don't deserve to keep you away from your brother. My hatred will only make your brother difficult. I will not make my husband choose me or his family. Whatever you look at me. God willing I will survive, but if Rafa doubted me. I won't stand next to him!" hana said softly, Rafa nodded slowly. Rafa looked at the face of Hana who he loved so much. Hana walks away from Rafa and Kiara.

"Dear, thank you for accepting my sister as your own!" rafa said while holding Hana's hand. With a nod and a smile, Hana replied to Rafa's words. Rafa kisses Hana's hand. Rafa's friendly attitude is always able to calm Hana's heart.

Rafa and Kiara walked into the hut not far from where they were standing. After Rafa and Kiara sat down, Kiara gave Rizal a piece of paper that he gave this morning. Rafa took the paper from Kiara, he read the paper carefully.

"Kiara Putri Prawira, a name that was beautiful in my mind. Why haven't you seen her since the first time? I'm interested in getting to know you, the fact that you're my best friend's sister. It makes me want to understand you more. The book that accidentally fell out of your hand. A sign of you makmum I crave. A woman who expects heaven from her husband. A truly sholeha woman. A woman who wants to be a blanket for her husband. Showing great affection later. I say your name in every bow, I imagine you in a third of my night. Only with you my best prayer. A book that accidentally stuck me in on you. An opening for me to find you. I told abi about my intentions. He asked me, how much are you in my prayers and prostrations? He believes you are the makmum that I crave. Now he wants to meet you. Not to force or judge. He wants to see and hear what heaven you are in. Never hesitate to answer abi's question. No one forced you to accept me. Be sure to tell me your doubts. I hope that you answer abi's question. I won't force myself into the paradise you're going to be. But I hope you will makmum my afterlife. The ribs that I lost from my body. I'm afraid my quest ends with you!"

"What does this writing mean? What's your relationship with Rizal? Why would Mr. Kyai want to see you?" rafa said, Kiara shook her head weakly. Rafa was surprised to read the writing. Rizal never once told her how he felt about Kiara. But a piece of white paper, able to answer all the questions that Rafa had in mind.

"Sir Rafa, what should Kiara do? What happened wasn't Kiara's wish? I came here to seek knowledge. Repairing the broken self, seeking faith and Islam. Sorry Kiara!" she said softly, Rafa nodded slowly. Rafa and Kiara stared fixedly at the twilight that began to disappear into the dispute.

"What makes you apologize? Every heart has the right to love, because love is a gift not a mistake. Rizal obviously wrote he didn't force you to accept his love. Why should you be nervous and afraid? Just say no, if you don't like it. Accept it, if you think Rizal is a good candidate for priest. The Rizal family is very nice. They won't get angry or hurt if you reject them. Say it according to your heart, your innermost voice!" said Rafa casually, Kiara shook her head weakly. Suddenly he resuscitated his head on Rafa's shoulder. Kiara stared fixedly at the twilight that disappeared changing into the evening. Sayub heard a murrotal sound from the mosque speker.

"Ustad Rizal was not a good candidate for priest, but he was a perfect priest. As an ordinary woman, her good looks captivated my heart. As a santri, I would be proud to be the wife of Ustad Rizal. But religiously and faithfully, he and I are different. We are two paths that intersect, as if it were hard to become one. Family background, obviously different. His family is faithfully respected and our family is faith-tainted. I don't want to be a stain, for a clean white cloth. Nor can I become a white cloth, forgetting the stain that once existed. Mama Sabrina's past, will never be separated from my life. Nor do I let the past follow Rizal's. As bad as my mother, she was the woman who gave birth to me. As good as ustad Rizal is, he's the best candidate for priest who might lead me. I'm not afraid of getting hurt, but seeing someone who loves me get hurt. I'll never be able to. I'll never be ashamed of Sabrina's past. But let the people I love bear the shame. Wholeheartedly I will never be willing. Brother Rafa, tell me which path I should choose!"

"Ask your heart when you prostrate. The best answer is only from Him. All are arranged according to His decree. There will not be one human being who is able to choose as well as HE. Put it in your bow, there is still the remaining prayer of magrib and isya. Rafa is sure there will be the best answer. Kiara, never hesitate to say your heart. For the heart is as pure as the mind. Rafa will always be supportive, whatever your choice. Rafa just wanted to remind me. Appreciate Rizal's love, he is not wrong and must be defeated by Sabrina's mama's past. The proof Rizal had already said his intention to abi Malik. It means he's sure of you. Abi Malik's request to meet, means he appreciates Rizal's wish for you. Love is not just having, but appreciating. At least if you accept it you can't. Appreciate the feeling and leave it to His decree!" said Rafa, Kiara nodded while leaning on Rafa's shoulder.

" We're in Kiara, sister Hana must be worried looking for me. You know, Mila's ustadzah is here. Fear he's jealous, get ready to pray magrib!" Rafa.

"Sir Rafa, thank you. Love you!" kiara said, Rafa rubbed Kiara's head covered with hijab.

"Sir Rafa loves you too!"

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