My Love My Pain
Purpose to live

Airin blinked his eyes a few times. He looked around, the atmosphere of the hospital was very thick. Moreover, there is an infusion hose on his right hand.

"You're a wean?"

Airin looked at the sound. Vino came in with a fruit pack in his hand.

"Thank you for accompanying me."

"No need to talk to me."

Not long after a doctor and a nurse entered. They display a smile, perhaps as a sign of encouragement to patients.

"How's mom doing?" ask the doctor.

"It's off doc." Airin also gave a smile, "I'm sick, Doc?"

The doctor asked the nurse to tell him what happened to Airin. With the explanation of the doctor's language makes Airin feel confused. What's more, Vino, he's just been quiet ever since.

"Actually, the mother is not sick," the doctor turned to Vino, "It just so happens that here there is a mother's husband."

"He's not..."

Vino clasped Airin's hand and made Airin stop talking.

"The collision that occurs in the mother's stomach, makes the mother miscarry."

Airin rubbed his eyes. I can't believe what the doctor said. How could she be pregnant and not feel at all. Nothing has changed in his physique.

"Is this your first pregnancy?"

Airin nodded slowly.

"Oh yeah, maybe after this mom will be hard to have another baby."

Back Airin was made dumbfounded.

"Why can?" vino asked the doctor.

The doctor gave a smile to Airin and Vino.

"Mother's relationship is very weak. So, you have to be careful if you're pregnant again."

Vino's hand was getting tighter. Airin shook his head, he couldn't believe all this. Like falling down a ladder.

"For the moment. I can go home" said a nurse.

"good. I will take care of his administration" said Vino.

Airin was still stunned. Until the doctor and nurse left. Slowly, clear liquid came out of his eyes. He could not bear this wound.

"If you want to cry. Just cry" said Vino.

Airin lamented at her heavily injured self this time. She had to lose her baby and her husband. Not completely losing a husband. He was accompanied by others when his son left. While Arja is having fun with other women.

"You can cry all over." Vino held Airin in his arms. He wanted Airin to share the wounds that Airin felt.

***

Airin came out accompanied by Vino. Yeah, Vino's always there beside Airin. Even if the result is the same, Airin will consider him a friend. Arriving at the parking lot, Airin chose to remain motionless.

"Want me to take you?" ask Vino.

Airin shook his head, "No. I'm going somewhere else today."

"really. Then let my driver deliver you."

Once again Airin shook his head, "I don't want to trouble you continuously. For everything I'm so grateful."

"alright. Then I'll see you tomorrow at the office."

"Ready, Boss."

"Rin. Grandma wanted to see you, you haven't seen her in a long time" Vino said.

Airin remembered the old woman who used to accompany Airin and Vino to play. The woman abandoned by her family. Like me, who is always abandoned.

"Would you like to visit with me?" ask Vino again.

"Next time I'll see Grandma. This time, I have to take care of my problem."

"alright. I'll go first."

Airin waved his hand. After Vino really left. Airin stopped a taxi. He thought about what he would do this time.

***

The atmosphere is visible in this house. There were only a few servants who were milling about. There will be an important event in this house. They didn't even tell Airin.

"I'm coming" Airin just walked in. Some of the servants warned him not to enter.

Maya who was sitting with her magazine was shocked to see Airin coming. He stood up and stared dislikefully.

"How are you and your baby?" ask Airin.

"Don't pretend to be good. I know you lied to Arja about your pregnancy."

Maya puts the magazine down and gets close to Airin. He ruffled his waist as if Airin would be scared if he did.

"What did you say? are you trying to threaten me?"

Airin chuckled, "What am I threatening. I'm here to see my husband."

"He's not here." Maya immediately threw away her face.

"Alright if you don't tell me. I'll find it myself."

Tired of being a woman who looks good and is bullied. Airin must be able to fight Maya and Arja, as well as Kenzo. Airin was looking for Arja all over the room, not the Arja I got. Even Kenzo is sitting by the pool.

"Wow. You came to visit?" ask Kenzo with a shitty look.

Airin who was lazy to serve him immediately turned back around. He didn't want to say anything to Kenzo. Kenzo even pulled Airin's hand.

"You're a good first wife. If only I could have you."

Plaque, Airin slapped Kenzo hard. Without Kenzo conscious, Kenzo considers Airin an easy-to-have woman.

"Don't touch me carelessly. I'm not a cheap woman."

"You look angry. What's up?" ask Kenzo.

"It's none of your business."

Airin went back to Maya. He was still fixated on what Airin was doing. During this time Airin has received everything with a chest roomy. Not that Airin didn't dare to fight back. The reason Airin didn't fight back was because she still respected Arja as her husband.

"Tell to Arja. Meet me this afternoon, if not. There's gonna be a problem with your future son."

Maya is upset and pushes Airin down.

"You have been brave to me. Do you want me to tell Arja everything about you and Vino."

Maya again tries to threaten Airin with stories of the past. Airin stood up and cleaned the dust that was stuck to his clothes. He looked at Maya.

"Anything you can say to Arja."

Maya is shocked to hear the answer Airin gave.

"Arja will forgive me for up to this point. I'm not in a relationship with Vino, what if Arja finds out about your fake pregnancy? will he forgive you?"

Plaque, Maya slapped Airin so hard. Even to the point of impregnating.

"Basic crazy woman. You can't get pregnant and now you're accusing me of something that's not about me."

"I'm really crazy. You want to know what I'm crazy for?" Airin approached and whispered, "because my son was dead last night."

Maya's eyes widened. He was surprised by what Airin said. Maya may also be shocked by Airin's pregnancy. But it's too late. Airin's fetus has fallen, even she will be difficult to have children again.

"Tell me what you have to say to Arja. I'm going to go now."

Airin stepped foot out of the house. The house that used to be a paradise for Airin and Arja. But now it is a place that makes Airin always hurt.

***

Airin remembered what Vino said when we were in the hospital. He accidentally saw Maya there.

\=Flashback in the hospital.\=

"Yes, I heard it myself. That's not Arja's son, I don't know who he is. He looks very familiar" Vino said.

"I don't want to hear anything anymore" said Airin.

"wait. Don't you want to know what's next?"

Out of curiosity. Airin sat down opposite Vino.

"Say whatever you hear." This time it was Airin himself who asked Vino to say everything.

"Yes. Maya came here with someone named Kenzo. I don't know who he is, which obviously they're very friendly."

Airin was silent listening to that.

"Then I overheard their conversation about Arja. Maybe Arja is also involved with this.”

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know anymore. What's clear is that they're talking about pay and the next set of children."

\=Return to the present moment.\=

Airin was still thinking about what Vino said. What does all that mean. Clearly, Airin was upset at the loss of his son. Airin's current goal is to get divorced from Arja and find a real life.

Airin wanted to close the wound and open a new story. Without hurt and hurt.

***