Healing
65. Attitude Change

In the deserted mosque, Bian and I performed Maghrib prayers together, just the two of them, because the other worshippers had finished praying since then and had come out of the mosque. Only a few people who are still in the mosque are reciting.

After greeting and coming out of the mosque, one of the fathers who lived around the mosque complex approached me and Bian who was walking down the mosque foyer which was quite a lot of stairs.

" I'm sorry are you the owner of the car parked out front?", asked the man with a pias face and a forehead full of sweat.

" It's true that's my car, why sir?", asked Bian curious about the expressions of the fathers who looked very worried.

" I'd like to ask Mas for help, please take my daughter to the hospital, my daughter wants to give birth, but she can't sit on the bike, I have ordered a car online but did not come, my daughter has been in a lot of pain Mas", said the middle-aged fathers with a pleading tone.

Bian and I looked at each other. I just nodded my head, feeling sorry for the fathers, thinking about the time I was about to give birth and my papa was very panicked, just like that person.

" Where is your father's house?, let me take your daughter to the hospital" Bian said as he walked to the car.

The fathers showed me his house not too far from the mosque. The location of the mosque is on the side of the highway, but the house there is also still rare, because it is on the slopes, and hilly.

Bian and I got out of the car and helped the young mother who was about to give birth earlier to get into the car. Accompanied by his father and wife, we went to the nearest hospital.

Along the way the father's daughter kept crying in pain, the father and mother said the house midwife had to go up the hill, but three days the midwife was on duty in the city, and finally they decided to go to the hospital for the birth.

We drove them into the delivery room.

" Thank you very much, thankfully there was Mas and Mbakya in the mosque, otherwise we certainly have not been here now", the fathers reached into their pockets and clutched a piece of blue money in Bian's hands.

" No sir, we sincerely help, this is to help the cost of the father's daughter, it will certainly take a lot of cost", refused Bian while pushing the hands of the fathers and returned the money.

" Because it's night, we're both saying goodbye to going home, sorry to not wait for your daughter to give birth, it looks like it's your first grandchild?", guess me.

" Yes right, my daughter is only 1 year married, her husband is working in a big city, wandering, now on her way home. Maybe we'll be here soon. Once again we thank you very much Mba, Mas", said the fathers with gratitude.

Bian and I just nodded and left the hospital, for some reason I remembered the moment when I gave birth to Shaka, fortunately there was Ara midwife whose house was not too far away, she was willing to help me, she said, no need to bother going to the hospital.

" Why silence Ra?, what is still the thought of the person who wants to give birth earlier?. Take it easy, I will definitely be a standby husband, and will never leave you to go to work in the big city".

Bian's guess doesn't match what I'm thinking. Because at this time I am not worried if I will get pregnant and give birth, precisely what is in my mind now is the time when I gave birth without a husband. And because I remember that, I who have started to forgive Yoga so I hate it again. The pain of giving birth to Shaka is nothing, compared to the heartache that has been inculcated by the Yoga family in me and my family.

But I can't possibly tell Bian what I'm thinking right now, Bian doesn't need to know if my son's father is Yoga, his best friend.

" I didn't think of anyone, and I also believed that you would be a standby husband when I got pregnant later. I was just thinking about Shaka, when I saw the mother-to-be in pain, I remembered the time when I wanted to give birth to Shaka first. It doesn't seem like it hurts that much, but it's true that every baby's birth is different. Maybe that person was a very painful one, so that person kept saying sick".

" Or maybe because there is no place for me to lean and pamper like the young mother who wanted to give birth earlier, so there is no pain that I feel. Because it's closed by the heartache of the very person who has caused me to feel all that".

Bian drove his car, but not towards his house, Bian was heading towards my house. " We just go home to you, it's 8 o'clock more, then mom and dad you can worry if you haven't reached home last night" said Bian.

Though it was only 8, but why didn't Bian take me to his house?, did he not like me telling my past while giving birth?, I don't know...

Bian just agreed. Why did his attitude immediately change like that, was there any wrong or displeased words in his heart?, I told him to go home he immediately agreed, though usually Bian will mention thousands of reasons in advance so as not to be immediately told to go home. But this time he just agreed, a little strange.

When I got home, Bian really immediately parted, even though we had not had dinner, when I offered to eat at my house Bian did not want to, but we did not want to, with the reason still full and want to go home and rest at home.

I can't hold it any longer either. Bian immediately walked back alone to his car on the big road.

" Why are you?, did something happen at the camp?", asked Mama when Bian had left the house.

It turns out that she also noticed Bian's change in attitude, which meant that it wasn't just me who felt that Bian was a little weird and different.

" Nothing happened Ma, didn't know Bian so that's how we helped people give birth earlier".

And I told you what happened to Mama, from the beginning we got to the camp, about Shaka being the singing champion, about Bian cooking for Shaka's dinner and his friends. Also about us who deliver prospective young mothers who want to give birth to the hospital.

" Or maybe there was a saying of Raya that Bian did not like, because it was Raya so remembered the time Raya gave birth to Shaka first, when she saw the young mother was about to give birth".

" It's Ma, Raya is tired and wants to rest first, tomorrow Raya must prepare early so as not to be late to her workplace".

Mama nodded and walked out of my room and closed the door.

Just as I was breaking down my phone rang, there was an incoming call from Yoga. Actually I was lazy to lift, but Yoga kept calling me, I had to lift, who knows there is something important to say.

" Hello assalamualaikum", I said after sliding the picture of the green phone handle".

The sound of Yoga was immediately heard clearly answering my greetings there, it turned out that Yoga called because Yoga wanted to ask where Shaka was camping. I didn't want to tell her, but Yoga threatened to ask Bian if I didn't tell him. I finally had to tell you where Shaka camp was.

Out of nowhere Yoga knew that if Shaka was camping, I did not keep his contacts, not because he saw my status. Is it possible that he saw Bian's status uploading a picture of me who was a manyun in front of the stage when Shaka performed?. Probably also.

" If you want to see it, look at it from afar, please don't disturb his life. I don't want her teenage years to be full of problems if she knows the truth, I beg of you Ga. If you really want to be a good father. At least you won't hurt her and remain a stranger to the end".

That's the sentence I said before hanging up the phone from Yoga, somehow since I kept thinking about him, either because Shaka's face is getting bigger so it's more similar to Yoga during Junior High. Or because I had seen people want to be born, so I remembered the time I used to want to give birth to Shaka, so I remembered Yoga who did not come to accompany labor at that time.

When I just put it next to my pillow, my phone rings again. I saw Yoga calling me back.

" What else?, have I told you where Shaka camp is, is it still unclear what I said earlier?", I asked in a soft voice, worried that mom and dad heard my conversation with Yoga.

" Tomorrow accompany me to the camp, I pick up at 5 pm, should be able to" said Yoga in a pushy tone.

" I'm sorry, sir, whose hobby is to do anything at will, tomorrow I work, and I go home from work I want to rest, tired!". I hung up from Yoga again. Males was talking to him. The edges again forced their own will.

To find it safe, I finally turned off my phone. So Yoga can't call me anymore. But after my phone turned off I just remembered Bian, since he said back home until now, Bian did not send a message, or call me. Is it true that he is angry with me, his attitude is so different. Usually he immediately informed me if it had reached home, but until now Bian had not informed me.

I'd better ask him tomorrow, what's wrong.