Healing
87. Ex-Friend

For half an hour, I was still standing upright staring at Utari without saying a word. I allowed him to slightly reduce the heavy burden and pain in his heart by crying.

Crying does not solve the problem, but by crying sometimes the feeling of sadness, which initially feels very bad will be a little better, because that's what I sometimes do if my mood is bad. By crying so much, without the knowledge of others of course.

" Raya, what are you doing here?, why don't you go home late, mama you tell papa to follow you here. Has Bian gone home yet?, and who are the two?. Are they your guests?". Papa caught up with me, probably because it was 9 o'clock more, and I hadn't been home yet, making the others so worried.

" This. yes, my friend Raya pa", I was confused what to answer.

" Why even on chatting here, please stop by the house, it's night, it's not good for girls to be outside the house. Moreover, it seems to be sick huh?", asked Papa while staring at Utari who was still sitting in a wheelchair with a pale face.

" Let's please stop by our house?, why are you even letting your sick friend stay out of these nights Ra....".

It seems papa forgot about Utari, indeed Utari had only played home once when he wanted to go up Mount Rinjani. And at that time Utari was healthy and so cheerful, it was appropriate if papa forgot or pangling with the present Utari.

" I'm sorry, if I could just talk to you in my car for a second. Om can wait for us near the car for a while with the nurse while we chat".

Finally Utari spoke as well, though still in a weak voice, and I saw papa nodding, papa did not mind waiting for me near Utari's car. When I got in the car following Utari, the nurse kept waiting outside with papa. Papa was chatting with the nun, I don't know what they were talking about.

" Do you not intend to apologize to me first?. Why do you shut up when you see me. You're surprised, aren't you, because I came here all night?".

Utari spoke in a soft tone, unlike my worries at the beginning, I thought she would get angry and berate me. I thought he was gonna slap me, and grab my hair like it's in soap operas. But it didn't all happen. Even now we sit close together and look at each other.

" Why aren't you mad at me?, why don't you slap me on the cheek or grab my hair, why do you keep being nice to me after all the bitterness you've felt because of me?".

" How many times do I have to say an apology to you to make you forgive all my mistakes Ri?, even I have prepared myself to hear the insults, mockings, and swearing from you. I realize I've been a really bad friend to you. From the beginning I did not dare to tell the truth. Because I don't want to ruin all of our friendships and friendships".

I can no longer hold back the tears that have been held in my eyes since, from the beginning Utari cried to sob, I have felt very hurt. I saw such a deep sadness on Utari's face. As a fellow woman, I can also feel how much pain in lying. Because I've felt it myself.

" The truth is you don't have to apologize to me, I was angry with you, I thought God was unfair to me, because He made Steve love you more than I did. I'm jealous, I'm jealous and I'm angry when I find out that the girl Steve loves is you, the person I know and already consider my best friend".

" But when I heard Steve's confession about what he'd done to you, your anger, hate, disappointment, and jealousy turned to pity. I can't imagine how devastated you were when Steve and his family raised their hands from the thorny problems that befell you".

" I never thought Ms. Herni was that bad, she even lied to me saying Steve was never close to any girl in the first place".

" My goal is to come here, there's only one thing I want to ask you Ra... Do you still love Steve Ra, please answer the truth?".

Utari's question made me shake my head immediately. " It's been a long time, a long time, I don't love her. Since I was disappointed with his attitude. The love and affection that I once had for her was gone and I buried it deeply with all the wounds I felt".

" If I'd been honest, I'd almost given up, if it wasn't for my family's support, I would've done something bad".

Utari breathed a long breath. " I don't know why, despite knowing Steve's infamy, I don't want to cancel my marriage with him. Although I knew in Steve's heart there was only you, but I didn't mind that, as long as it was just me, him and you who knew, don't let my parents know about this".

" My family is a distinguished family, and so is Steve's family, who are influential people in the region. Our marriage is unlikely to be annulled, it could defame our family".

" I don't have a problem keeping this a secret, if it's the best way. But one thing I ask of you, Ra, never to see Steve again, after we marry each other, our partners, let's open a new page by acting like we never know each other. Maybe that's the best way out we can choose".

Utari hugged me, I returned her embrace, I felt Utari patting my back slowly. Maybe this is a farewell hug, because in the future we will live to be strangers who do not know each other.

I got out of Utari's car, and the nurse who was with Utari got into the car and sat on the steering wheel. It turned out that he was Utari's friend in the hospital, as Utari worked as a dentist there.

Papa invited me back home without asking anything, papa indeed never forced me to tell what happened to me, before I told it myself willingly. Papa respects my privacy, but will gladly listen if I need someone to be a good listener.

" It turns out that the girl was your friend who used to come to pick you up when going to the climb, huh?, papa did not remember it at all, if only the nurse had not said that the girl was a dentist in the hospital. Papa so remember your friend who became the dentist who came at that time when the nurse told. Is he sick?".

I nodded, "She may be tired of getting married in two days" I replied briefly, we are now on the porch.

Papa looked at me in surprise, "So you're getting married on the same day and date?. What a coincidence it could be like that. But so can't attend each other's wedding, because it's the same".

I just nodded, that's right, couldn't attend each other, because that's what we wanted, our current status was a former friend, so it wasn't expected to be her presence at each other's wedding. Because if anyone arrives, it will just mess up the event, whether I am there, or those who come to my wedding, it will just make a mess.

" Where have you been?, making Mama worried. Papa was told to nyusulin you, even long time not back and forth. Almost mama told Juna to nyusulin you guys", mama immediately approached me who had just entered the house.

" There was a friend of Raya coming, but papa told me to stop by not want the person. Even ask permission to talk to Raya in her car, so papa wait for them next to the car" Papa said trying to explain.

" Who's friend Rita?, or Hani?, since when do they have a car?".

Mama is the one who often comes to the house if not Rita ya Hani.

" Not the two, Raya's friend who became the dentist, who used to pick Raya up the mountain" papa still trying to explain.

I saw my mom trying to remember.

" The kingdom of sleep first yes Ma, Pa, Raya again does not pray, so want to go straight to sleep, already sleepy", I say to mom and dad.

" This is a child, again being invited to chat and even playing in the room just like that. Mama hasn't finished her raya".

Mama raised her voice because I had closed the door to my room.

" Tomorrow again ma, Raya is very sleepy and tired, in the first note the question, tomorrow convey the same Raya, surely Raya answered one by one", I said from inside the room.

Mama seemed angry, because there was a voice of papa who persuaded mama to go and not bother me who wanted to sleep.

" Already come Ma, we sleep too, is not the activity tomorrow is very dense, he said mama want to make a cake, continue to make anything macem-macem, do not sleep overnight so that tomorrow does not sleep continuously".

Papa's last voice was heard, now that the house had become quiet, I opened my phone which I had been living in the room since. There are missed calls up to 27x calls from Yoga.

Why else would he call me, I'm so tired today, too much drama is happening today. I need a break to clear my head. I turn off my phone so no one interferes with my break tonight. I put the phone on the nightstand, and I closed my eyes. Hopefully when you wake up tomorrow, everything will be better.