I Borrowed Him : Diary Luna
Season 4: Episode 3
I walked out to see Luna who was in the isolation room with close supervision from the team of doctors, I could only look at her from behind the glass. At that time I saw Luna lying on a hospital bed with various medical devices attached to several parts of her body, Luna's small body drooped helplessly, her head was no longer covered by the wig that used to decorate her all this time, Luna's hair was completely invisible, and her face now looked very pale.
All this time he's been covering things up really well, until I never realized it. "Have you been like this since High School? why did I never realize it?" I asked in my heart, but as if my conscience denied it by saying "Didn't the incident with Natalie at that time Luna had shown signs of strange? it wasn't Luna who was great with her lies, but I was the one who was never sensitive".
I banged my forehead against the glass right in front of me where I could see Luna lying down, my conscience right about me. I was a fool, I was the problem in my relationship with Luna first. The one who should be blamed is me, not putting all my failures on him. Luna has repeatedly shown strange gelagat, but I. I who used to say if love him even insensitive at all...
"How can I say I love him when I don't understand him at all? how stupid I was." I muttered at that moment
I felt the strength of Luna's determination to realize her last dream, her pale face confirmed that Luna had fought hard enough and forced her body. I sighed and then left the place, I had to go back to the hotel to clean myself with all the bloodstains still on my clothes and pants.
At the hotel where we were staying at that time I immediately headed for the restaurant to at least put some food in my mouth, all I do is that my health condition does not decrease because there is only me who has to take care of Luna. But after taking some kind of food, this hand remains reluctant to touch it. My sense of responsibility to Luna who finally can force the hand to put food into the mouth by force, as well as I also force this mouth to swallow every food that enters even though it feels drag on the neck.
In the end I managed to finish my breakfast despite the torture, now I immediately return to the room to clean myself. I flushed this body back with a shower to arrange my broken heart, in my mind saying "Why didn't Luna just be honest with me? it's all your fault, because you're not being honest! it's all your fault, Luna!!" back I blame Luna, all because I'm a coward who doesn't admit my own mistakes.
For almost an hour I flushed my body to the point of shrinking it, yet I still could not arrange my broken heart. I finished my bath and immediately I dried this body, after dressing I also laid this body on the mattress. My eyes looked up at the sky - the sky of the hotel room and again daydreamed, in my head remembered the words of the doctor who said Luna had been supporting her health with high doses of drugs to achieve something in her life.
"Can you continue on this journey?" I murmured and did not feel like I was asleep with tears flowing.
A few hours passed, when I opened my eyes I saw the sky from behind the window of the hotel room was a little dark sign if the afternoon had replaced the morning. With a cloudy cloud covering the sky this afternoon, it seemed to describe my mood. Slowly I got out of bed and was about to visit Luna even though I could only look at her from behind the glass, by taxi I left for the hospital where Luna was treated.
After paying the taxi fee, I immediately went out and I stepped foot into Luna's room. From behind the glass I still saw him lying in the same position, there was no sign of him moving all night.
"Wake up Luna. I promise to accompany you to complete all your dreams.." - I muttered, my hand touched the glass and wished I could touch you this time even if it was impossible.
I put on my forehead and lamented all my regrets, my heart was so sad and afraid to see you still lying limp like that. I think I'll wait for you here until you wake up, but that's all I didn't do because someone suddenly slammed me hard. He pulled my arm and put it on the boat, and then the guy slammed me on the floor as if we were practicing judo.
"Armghh!!! what - what the fuck?!!!" I snapped with a groan of pain, to be honest it really hurt and I didn't lie.
The figure is. papa, yes, my papa William Gates arrived - arrived to Paris somehow his destination. When did he come and what did he come for, he asked in his heart "Why do you know I'm here?" but the question was immediately I denied considering I had just used a family credit card to pay for Luna hospital, of course papa would receive the notification.
"Papa?!! what is papa doing here?!" I was still lying in pain on the floor
"I'm here specifically to beat up a cheat!!" answer papa with a snatch
I was surprised by papa's answer to the point of making me petrified, our eyes met at the time. But I'm sure papa knows I'm confused by what he just said, for a moment papa turned his attention to look at Luna from behind the glass.
"She...the woman who came to see us, right?" ask papa a little stammered, it looks like papa is trying to remember the figure of Luna who is now very different from what papa knows.
I stood up and put my forehead back in the mirror, I looked back at Luna who was still lying with various medical devices attached to her body.
"Yes..he's Luna, remember? we were just talking about him when I ran away from home" I replied
"Of course you remember, but what's wrong with him? papa until it is difficult to remember" asked papa sounding surprised, I sighed for a moment before answering papa's question.
"The story is long papa." I replied hanging.
"You want to tell your papa this?" ask papa as if papa wants to be my place to express all my heart, I know papa is very understanding about my sadness.
I just stared at him in silence, not knowing what kind of expression I looked before my father at that time. Because without much question, at that time papa was looking for a place for us to chat comfortably. Papa looked to the left right before we finally looked at each other again, then I said..
"We need a more comfortable place, I want to hear your opinion on what I should do" I said
When papa immediately gave me a gesture to follow him, we got out of the hospital and walked a little far from the hospital to a cafe that seemed like papa had been very familiar about this cafe. We sat in the corner of the cafe looking at each other, we were silent for a while after choosing some menus to accompany us to chat.
"Okay son, tell me what's really going on. I thought you were having an affair because I received a hospital payment notification in Paris via your credit card" papa said, breaking the silence, I looked at papa with annoyance and honestly I can't believe papa had such thoughts on me.
"Which cheating made the hospital their date spot, papa?" I asked in an annoyed tone, papa just threw away his face with a face without sin.
"Why really think I'm having an affair in the hospital?!!!" I snapped at that moment
"Have you told me what happened, you stupid boy!!" papa back yelled at me, with a look of annoyance I looked at the father who seemed embarrassed to accuse me who did not - no but did not want to be blamed.
"Haah.. I want the story all from the beginning, it might be boring but. My heart is really broken at this time. I need papa's wisdom.." with a sigh I said it.
I started telling everything from our beginning of High School to the new - just now that was happening between me and Luna, there was not the slightest thing I missed so that papa could judge it objectively. I needed a look from someone else's glasses so that I wasn't wrong in stepping, to be honest I was already very confused by all my own thoughts.
"I understand and fully understand what you are thinking" papa said when I finished telling the story, we briefly fell silent as I lowered my head.
"Remember son, you are Miss Naomi's future husband. But he gave you a way to settle your past with Luna, according to papa. Do it responsibly, but you must remember that Miss Naomi is waiting for you" he continued
Papa's advice at that time seemed to answer my question about whether I should still think of Luna when there is Naomi who is my lover at this time, I should still think of Luna, the present me will not deserve to be Naomi's companion at all costs because the past still disturbs my heart and mind. I have now regained the path I must take, all to settle my past debts.
"I get it, papa" I pulled my phone out of my pants pocket and called Naomi. Not long after, Naomi picked up my phone.
***
"Yes, Jess... How? what's up?" naomi asked in panic
"Naomi..there's something I need to talk to you about" I hesitated, I'm not sure she'll accept my idea.
"Gini. I know this is going to sound ridiculous to talk to you about, but I can't do that without your consent." I said, I heard Naomi's little laugh from behind the phone and I was amazed.
"Why... are you laughing?" ask me for wonder
"I know what you want to say to me, honestly I thought strange - strange when I heard you want to say something to me" replied Naomi who was still with her little laugh
"Strange - weird what?" I was curious, Naomi's laughter gradually disappeared and she heard him sigh.
"I thought you were in love with Luna again and wanted to leave me... Aaa~ come on, I think too much of a bad thought" replied Naomi, I get it. She was burning flames of jealousy instantly when I said I wanted to talk to her about something.
"No. I didn't think I'd leave you" I tried to calm her down with words, I said, if I had been close to her by this time I'd been holding her so she'd be sure I loved her.
"You want to accompany Luna there until she's healthy? or is there something else I might not have thought of, Jess?" naomi asked, sounding calm
"Actually.I want to finish my past, just like Luna. I don't want any regrets in my life, I need your permission and.." I haven't finished talking, Naomi cut it off.
"I understand and I give you permission.but, Jess.I'm worried about you.." Naomi sounded so anxious, I was again amazed by what Naomi said.
"Why with me? the situation is not good - it's Luna and not me" I asked confused, Naomi sounded sigh again
"How can I not worry about your situation, Jess. Luna's refusal just made you fall down until you have to be accompanied by Luke and Harry to rise up, then now you must be faced with the situation of Luna who struggles between life and death. Now tell me, how can I not worry about that?" naomi replied in a voice that sounded so soft
"I'm fine, Naomi.." - Timpalku
"You always say it like that, but I'm sorry I don't trust you for this. I can feel the pain in your heart, Jess" naomi said it
"No, I make sure I'm okay" I firmly refused
"We once agreed to go through all the problems together - the same and.." Naomi said, I cut it because somehow my emotions came to a head.
"I'm fine!" my timpalku with a snap, Naomi was silent and at that time I regretted hitting her...
"Sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you. I.." I haven't finished apologizing, Naomi cut it off.
"It's okay.I get it, Luna wants to be with you. there.." Naomi said in a calm voice.
"Naomi.. there is a papa here, I will ask papa to accompany me. So you don't have to worry" I said.
"Huh?! papa's there?!!!" asked Naomi in a surprised tone
"I.iya. papa here" I answered stammered because I was shocked to hear Naomi who arrived - suddenly shouted.
"Give your phone to papa, I'll talk to papa!" pinta Naomi with coercion, I looked at the papa in front of me. For a moment I was silent until papa gave eye gesture, I gave my phone and with a gesture of lips I called the name Naomi to papa.
***
Papa and Naomi were talking to each other on the phone, I don't know what they were talking about I also didn't pay much attention to what papa said to Naomi. Not long papa hung up their phone, when returning the phone I asked...
"What are Naomi and papa talking about? why are you laughing?" I press papa
"You have a very kind and caring wife, son" replied the father and laughed again, smiling at my praise for Naomi.
"I know.." - My dream.