I Borrowed Him : Diary Luna
Season 4: Episode 8

We re-enjoyed the film with a laugh, slowly I let go of all my exaggerated thoughts to her and let all those bad thoughts meld with the sound of my laughter and Luna's laughter that night. Our smiles were glistened and in the middle of our film also capture the moment of our togetherness by taking pictures together using my cellphone camera, several times we took photos and Luna asked me to delete it because she felt she looked ugly.

I laughed and pretended to delete the photo, I purposely did not delete it because I wanted to have a lot of memories at this time with him. After being satisfied taking pictures at that time Luna took a small pink note from between the chair and her thigh, and, he gave a tick to one of his checklists and then showed me the rest of what we had to do after this.

"There's no problem, we're not going home until this is all over" I assured him, Luna looked so happy to hear.

Two hours passed and the movie was over, I stood up and pushed Luna's wheelchair back to the hospital. In the middle of the journey when I felt that Luna was asleep, she did not say anything and suddenly the atmosphere became so quiet between me and her. Once feeling anxious about Luna's state, I tried to ascertain her consciousness.

"Luna, are you okay?" ask me while I keep pushing that wheelchair.

"I'm fine, why brother?" ask Luna to sound calm

"You... more silent than usual, what's wrong?" I was worried, faintly I heard Luna's laughter.

"I'm sleepy. I'm sorry, sister, I'm troubling you" Luna replied, hearing her reply my heart was relieved.

"It's okay, go to sleep." I said it gently

Along the way Luna was asleep, sometimes I heard her snoring. I also tried to push the wheelchair very carefully so that Luna did not wake up because of the shock that might arise from the damage to the sidewalk, I did well until we arrived at the hospital. In front of the hospital entrance I saw Luna's father and mother waiting for our arrival with an anxious look, seeing our presence when it made Luna's father and mother run small to get closer.

"Is Luna okay young master Gates?" asked Luna's father to me, his voice sounded so worried about Luna's situation.

"She's fine.just fell asleep the whole way.." I replied trying to be very calm so as not to make the two worry more.

"Thank you young master Gates.." luna's mother's dream sounded so sad, Luna's mother was seen shedding her tears and it made me feel bad.

"It's okay, Mrs Lincoln, it's my promise with her. So no need to hesitate" I said a little panicked, I could not bear to see Luna's mother cry at that time. I feel how sad Mrs Lincoln's heart is to see her son so sick like this, if it's me, I don't know...

"You're a good man, young master Gates, not many people would care like you if you were in this position... Luna is very disturbing your relationship with young Miss Scott, whether if not you and young Miss Scott who Luna disturb.

"I was just doing what I had to do." I chimed in with a smile, at once I saw the look on both faces looking so relieved.

Luna's father took the wheelchair out of my hand and took Luna to his room, when I was about to say goodbye to Luna's mother but there seemed to be something she wanted to tell me.

"Young Mr. Gates, I don't know if I can say this to you or not." said Luna's mother at the time, when I was curious.

"What's the matter, Miss Lincoln?" much

"Since Junior High when he finally found out about his illness and had a life expectancy that was not long, Luna always confined herself in the room and just pensive without spirit at all. Only young Miss Parker can get Luna to come out of her room, but Luna has never smiled since. Until finally after graduating from Junior High School and in High School meet with you." replied Luna's mother and hung her sentence for a moment, luna's mother was seen regulating her irregular breathing as her cries grew louder.

"...Luna's smile on her way home from school was the sweetest smile I've ever seen, a long-buried smile... Luna said she found her love and at that time she began to diligently go for treatment and consult a doctor, but fate was really cruel to her. when the doctor said the condition of Luna's body was getting worse..." not done yet Luna's mother said, I cut it...

"Was it during the third-grade farewell at school?" I try to guess

"Yes..the night after you drove Luna home from school, Luna control and the doctor said her body was no longer able to survive, she could only cry and no longer take her medicine.she so blamed herself, she was so sorry for not being able to accompany you forever..." I cut back on Luna's mother's words because I knew what Luna's mother was going to say back then..

"I love her too. Now I don't deserve to say it, but I think I still love her, but right now all I can do is make sure that Luna can be happy with whatever I can do and give it to her." I said with a smile, luna's mother again cried sobbing - sobs while saying...

"Thank you for loving Luna and giving her such wonderful memories.Thank you for all the smiles you ever made on Luna's face..." with tears so heavy that Luna's mother said it, I didn't feel my tears dripping...

But.that moment out of nowhere I heard a voice.... Luna called my name...

I didn't lie.Luna's voice said "sister Jester" so ringing in my ear...

Amidst the atmosphere between me and Luna's mother, I saw a commotion from behind the glass door inside the hospital, several nurses were seen running from the direction Luna's room was located. The feeling of worry was so controlling my heart and mind, I ran to leave Luna's mother in front of the hospital to go inside. Inside I accidentally intercepted a nurse who was running - running towards the doctor's room, when I stopped her running by holding her arm.

"What's the commotion?!" I asked who panicked

"Patients on behalf of Miss Luna Lincoln are in critical condition, emergency surgery will be carried out. What is the patient's family member?! the doctor was waiting to explain the details" the nurse replied, the answer certainly jolted me and my spirit dimmed...

"There's a doctor's room, you ask there" the nurse replied, pointing to a room.

I galloped to the doctor's room, where I saw Luna's father sitting against the wall near the entrance of the doctor's room with tears so heavy. His bowed head made me see how many tears were coming out, his body was shaking violently and without asking any questions I actually knew how serious Luna's condition was right now.

"What... what happened, Mr. Lincoln..?" ask me with the breath that now feels so heavy

"The swelling of Luna's spleen is already intolerable.The surgical removal should be carried out immediately..but this is very risky.." replied Luna's father was laid out, replied, help me out there after hearing what happened to Luna.

My eyes felt dark, my body felt so cold, my legs felt limp and my head remembered Luna's voice. Inside my head were all the memories of Luna, her smile, her laughter, her anger, her promise and all the facial expressions she had ever given me. "Ngiiiiing" that's how the sound I heard filled my ears, I don't know what it was but for sure I was in shock...

I don't know what's going on, I just feel like Mr. Lincoln is leading me down one of the corridors right in front of the operating room entrance. Fainting Me? I don't know.it all feels so dark and this brain feels frozen, even crying I can't. This feeling of worry is too controlling my heart and mind, I just petrified in one of the waiting chairs.

"What's going on, Jess?!!" yelling Naomi right in front of my face, I was surprised to see her who was that close to me.

"I don't know.I just got word that Luna has to run the operation as soon as possible." I answered, at that moment I realized there was Selena, Grece and Luna's mother crying together.

When my eyes turned to the right and to the left I saw Justin, Luke and Harry, slowly lowering my head. All I could do right now was wait for Luna's promise to me, she already said she would try to recover from her illness. Well, he promised me, the little promise we've tied up...

I don't know how long it will take until the lights are out, and I, Naomi, Selena, Grece, instantly, and both of Luna's parents got up from sitting down and ran a little closer to the operating room door. Please - please worry rule my heart, my hands feel so cold and my heart beats so fast.

The room felt so quiet that the sound of footsteps of some people could be heard from behind the closed door. Not long after the door was open, I saw three doctors still wearing clothes to perform the operation out simultaneously from the operating room. Two doctors were seen walking away from us and there was only one doctor who walked up to us, when it was close to us the doctor's eyes looked at me.

"Sir Gates, we are very sorry about what happened. Ms. Luna's surgery failed.." said the doctor as he removed the mask.

"Luna!!!" at that moment I heard Naomi's scream, and the crying broke again in this room...

I lost all my energy until I sat on the floor, I no longer knew what or what about the other friends. I couldn't feel anything, my heart was broken, my breath was so tight, my head was going to explode at once. I was just silent but my tears were dripping so hard that the drops were soaking through my hands, I daydreamed when it was until papa's voice sounded.

"I know your heart feels very painful right now, son. But is this what Luna wants? falling and crying like that?!" kind of snapped at me saying

"Father!! let Jester cry!! his heart must be breaking right now, papa!! don't you have feelings?!!" snapped Naomi whose tone of voice sounded so vibrating

"What... should I do... Now, papa?" much

"You have to be a real man, son, get up and greet Luna with a smile" Papa replied to my question.

"What... should I.. welcome? he... is gone... lifeless... not listening... not feeling touch..... what should I welcome....... from him?" I asked papa's words

Not long after I heard the sound of the gurney wheel from behind the door where Luna was running her operation, when the door opened I was still pecking at my place. Somehow all the promises - Luna's promise to me back in the head, "He never kept his promise to me, then why am I sad? I should be mad at him!" so it's in my head

I slowly stood up and walked over to Luna's body which was on top of the gurney, her body covered in a white blanket as well as her face. My hand slowly opened the cloth covering his face, from behind the cloth I saw him smile. His eyes were tightly closed, his face was deathly pale yet he was still smiling...

"Why... are you still smiling?!" ask him with a snatch

"Jester!!" snapped Naomi warned me

But I ignored Naomi's warning at the time, I squeezed her shoulders and shook her body to wake her up....

"Wake up!!! lied down!! you fucking liar!!! I can't take this!!! if you leave again, I will never forgive you!!! Wake up... come back.. don't go anywhere.. don't leave me again.. I beg you, Luna..." that's what I said while continuing to shake his body.

At that moment Luke and Harry pulled me, and then Luke pushed me against the wall behind so hard. He's got me in there...

"Back to me!!! open your eyes, Luna!! Your voice..let me hear it one more time.I beg you.open your eyes.." I thrashed to release Luke's lock, but I didn't have the slightest energy.... these tears were so heavy I felt flowing down my cheeks, I did not accept this farewell...

"Wake Luna!!! you promised me you'd get well!!" I shouted again, when Luke also snapped right in front of my face...

"Don't talk like a loser!!! don't talk about useless things like that!!! the dead man, will only return to the ground!! even if you cry, she will never come back!!! stop crying even though your heart feels painful, want to be as sad as anything or as painful as you.. You must remain strong!! you heard me, you son of a bitch!!!" snapped Luke at me