Love Is Hurt (Wedding Polygamy)
Feel guilty
BEFORE READING DO NOT FORGET TO CULTIVATE LIKE YAA YES GUYS..........
CECHIDOTE......
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Is this my fault? Do I want to be in a position like this? Obviously I don't want to. I want to live happily like the other women my husband and children love. But circumstances brought me here.
"Mama, why?" asked Naro looking at me.
I was having lunch with Naro in Nara's inpatient room. My little girl has not yet opened her eyes. Either because of the influence of drugs, or indeed he was reluctant to wake up.
"Mama's okay, son," I answered while feeding Naro.
Naro is my source of power. I am grateful to have a child who grew up prematurely. When the whole world cornered me about Mas Galvin's departure, but Naro convinced me that everything would be fine. He hugged my body when it was fragile and helpless.
"Mama don't be sad. It's not Mama's fault" Naro rubbed my arm.
I don't know, I really felt guilty when Mas Galvin saved Nara. I feel like a murderer. Let alone the accusations from my ex-husband's family that continue to accuse this and that.
"Papa will be sad when you see Mama is sad. Papa has ordered Naro, to take care of Mama and Kak Nara. If Mama continues to be sad, Naro feels like a failure, Ma," he said looking at my face. A sad look with teary eyes made my heart ache.
Naro is still too small to understand any of this. Why does Naro's speech make me such an irresponsible mother.
"They're right, you're selfish, son," I said softly.
I shouldn't have shown my weak side in front of Naro. But I can't pretend to be strong.
"Mama."
That little body hugged me tightly. His hand rubbed my back. This body, is the body that I am leaning on. Having a boy like Naro is like being a pride to me.
"There's Naro, Ma. Mama was wrong. Mama doesn't have to feel guilty. It's Papa's decision, Ma. Papa wants to make amends to Nara."
Sometimes I can't believe it, these words come out of a 7-year-old. A young age who should only know about lessons and school or play with his friends. However, Naro has to deal with adult issues. He entered into a world he should not have known at all.
"I'm sorry Mama, son. Forgive Mama."
I tightly embraced this body. Crying as good as it is. My eyes have been swollen since yesterday mostly crying. Even I cried without pause, as if this pain was completely untreatable.
"Naro promised to always be there for Mama and Kak Nara" Naro said.
Naro let go of my embrace, and then the tiny little hands outstretched rubbing my cheeks that were already unkempt.
"We can, Ma," said Naro.
I nodded, I should have said that to my son. But why would a 7-year-old even say that to me.
"Thank you, baby, you're in your life. Mom promised, son. After this no one will dare hurt us" I rubbed Naro's head.
Naro nodded in understanding. Then go back to eating. My son doesn't talk much. Yesterday, Naro cried hysterically because of the departure of Mas Galvin. I know that Naro has always loved his Papa. It's just that Mas Galvin's busy work, making him lose time with Naro.
If anyone knew how much this guilt and pain punished me every second. Every time I see Nara sleeping comfortably in bed, I see a necklace around my neck. All like a wound that was scratched in there and then spilled vinegar so that it makes it sore and painful.
"Son, you continue to eat yes. Mama wants to see Sister Nara" I said.
"Yes Ma" answered Naro.
I walked towards Nara's brangkar. Then sit down next to the bed. I stared at this peaceful, shady face. Nara reminded me of Mas Galvin. Mas Galvin said if he missed his face just look Nara, then all the miss it will be treated. But why does this longing not stop torturing me.
"Nara," lirihku while holding the bare hands. "When you wake up, son. Mama miss you?" muttered. Too long it feels like waiting for Nara to wake up, I miss the cheerful figure that Nara always shows.
"Help Mama for Strong Son. Mom needs you to wake up. Mama found it all so hard. Fragile mother, son. Mama's tired, can you also fall asleep to eliminate all the fatigue in the chest."
I put my head on Nara's arm looking for comfort from her bare hands. As I close my eyes, I absorb all the excruciating pain in my chest. I don't understand why people just call it heartbreak because when I wake up, I find my body broken to pieces.
After a long time of disappointment in the human world, I only realized that there are two deaths. Death in its true sense, where it is truly alive yet feels dead. I am the second, I may be alive but on the other hand I also feel my soul and body dead.
"Fine."
I lifted my head, I saw Mr. Dante enter Nara's room.
"Yes sir," I said immediately wake up and wipe my tears.
"How's Nara doing?" ask her
"Still sir" I replied.
"Hospital problems, all I paid off. You don't have to worry," she explained.
"But Mr_"
"If you feel uncomfortable you can change the money later, but do not be rejected," cut Mr. Dante.
I nodded, apparently there are still good people who want to help even though they have no relationship other than the boss and his men.
"Thank you, sir, sorry for the trouble" I said unkindly.
"It's okay Ara," replied Mr. Dante smiling.
Mr. Dante sat down next to Naro who was eating voraciously. My boss comes to see me every day at lunch. I used to bring food for me and Naro.
I again think the problem of the resemblance of my face and the late wife of Mr. Dante, I have not had time to ask that. Let alone thinking about the matter, my problem is not finished yet.
"How are you, Son?" her question rubbed Naro's hair.
"Healthy Om Good," said Naro enthusiastically.
I sat down on the side of Nara's bed. In prayer and prostration I always hope that after this no more painful drama comes to my life.
Seriate...