My Cry and My Happiness Are In Your Home
finally, peace

two weeks went by,,,

the school exam is over, now me and the other daughter santri live facing the cottage exam which consists of oral and written exams.and of course this is the most thrilling test for all of us, the most thrilling test for us, because the final of this exam is a munaqosah trial that will be witnessed by all parents both santri putri and santri putra. here is an event for us to measure how deep our memory and ability to learn so far, and here is also a benchmark of how truly we are in search of knowledge. subhanallah,,, may Allah send forth and make all things easy, amen.

"hhmm, thank God my sentence is over, tomorrow you can already return to wearing your favorite hijab-hijab ana" said Selly as we sat back to unwind after cleaning the hall

"very cell, even already stinky again hijab his until want to vomit his ana use" said Dewi who is also one of my friends who yesterday entered in twelve violators Satri princess

"yee, it's a slovenly mah anti-ja never washed his hijab" Selly said again while pulling the tip of the Goddess' hijab

"want to be washed how people almost every minute must wear this violation hijab right. in two weeks, Bayangin dong how fragrant smeriwiyinggg,,, hehe" The goddess fluttered her hijab in front of my face and Selly, she said,

"waaahhh,, suwe nih people, just be careful" said Selly while giving a signal to me. seontak we immediately shower the Goddess with pinch and pull on the tip of her hijab

"aw,,, sick,, tickled hahaha,, pardon, forgive, forgive me, Iya sorryin deh sorryin" cried the Goddess for forgiveness and forgiveness to us, me and Selly stopped tickling and pinching the Goddess.

"wi, even here he was from earlier sought as well. said he wanted to nemenin ana out of the cottage today" said Nafisah who suddenly was in front of us without us knowing his arrival.

"oh yes forget, astaghfirullah" replied the Goddess by patting her forehead signifying that she had completely forgotten

"yes come on, ana has permission was the same part of security stay anti who has not" Nafisah told Dewi

"okay is ready" said Dewi while giving her thumb

"that's why Dewi ana borrowed it first yes man friend" he Nafisah, ask permission to me and Selly by putting on his grim smile

"had brought no permission all, it is not needed ko here also haha" said Selly while pushing the body of the Goddess towards Nafisah

"evil you sell,, hyks,, hiks, watch out for ana bales"

"have gone away, don't have drama" said I don't want to lose join nimbrung. Nafisah and Dewi left me and Selly who were still sitting casually on the chair of the hall.

"nur, no way yes less than a month we will graduate from here.ana not kebayang later if it is out of the way" said Selly staring straight ahead

"that's how it is, ana too" I answered briefly

"roughly abis from here anti want to continue college to where?" ask her to me

"not yet know, ana is still confused Sell, between going to college what's going on again"

"the hunch here means?"

"not his rich"

"where to?"

"don't know yet, just planning about it"

"this is mah if yes, suppose Gus hafidz really likes the same anti-constructive pattern passed later, about the anti-what answer?" I looked directly at Selly, who suddenly asked me something that never crossed my mind at all.

"nur, anti why not say honestly the same as ustadzah if the letter was from Gus hafidz at that time?"

"you know who Sell is?" ask me in a slightly surprised tone, why did Selly know about it

"not from anyone, ana just thought about it. but it turned out to be true, right?" ask Selly again to make sure

"yes, really" I answered while looking down

"why not be honest at that time?"

"ana honestly also will not change the situation right, still aja ana punished"

"yes too, even kayaknya will be complicated will arise a strange perspective from some of the santri let alone this related to Gus hafidz who has this cottage" said Selly guessed what I was thinking at that time, but I'm glad at least Selly didn't corner me like some of the other princess santri who said that I was pretentious, a mysterious pretentious, a mysterious pretentious, pretentious and others partly, but yes I do not want to think about things that make me hurt, anyway they just guess with their own minds.

"yeah yuk sel us to the dormitory now" I stood up, as well as Selly. we walked side by side towards the dormitory.

"nur,, you can talk for a while" Asyila was right in front of me and stopped my steps

"yes, I went to the dormitory first" said Selly who seemed to understand that Asyila just wanted to talk to me alone

I sat back on the chair in the hall, as well as Ashila.

we fell silent, no words came out of me to open this conversation because I wanted to let Asyila do the talking first.

"nur,, Afwan" assyila lowered her head along with tears that began to drip from her eyes. I was still speechless, letting Asyila finish what she wanted to say.

"Afwan because ana has stayed away from anti, Afwan because ana can not be trusted, Afwan because ana is so ego with feelings ana, Afwan because ana,,,,__"

"happy with Gus hafidz?" my word immediately cuts the word assyila

"where's anti-tau?" asyila immediately looked at me with an astonished look

"shil what is our friendship while it is? to the extent that one problem isn't one of us at all why it's making us stay away from each other?" ask me with a feeling of disappointment over his attitude assyila for these few days

"ana knew ana was wrong, ana was thinking too much about her feelings without thinking about her anti-friend feelings" she said with tears increasingly flowing

"that's not what makes ana disillusioned syil.is not about anti who does not think about ana's feelings, not syil.but ana disappointed because anti can not keep our friendship promise. anti inget who used to say that we should not break our friendship because of one problem.A problem of any size we have to solve by talking to each other, being open and trusting each other. in reality we are not talking to each other to solve the problem but instead avoid each other without talking" said I expressed all the disappointment in my heart

"iya nur ana is wrong, all this time ana always thinks and tries to make peace with her own feelings and it is very difficult especially this is about feelings for someone and it turns out she actually likes her own best friend. this heart refuses, this heart is disappointed, but ana knows this is wrong not like this ana should be. So once again Afwan for selfishness ana nur, ana nur, now ana sincerely tries to ridho for all the provisions of Allah. anti would you apologize ana nur?" asyila looked at me with a regretful look, and it really made me feel sorry for her

"ana sorryin anti ko, yesterday now and so on. ana only evaporates disappointment ana so that we do not get like this again in the future. anti not wrong ko syil, but, there is nothing wrong in this case.if ana can reverse someone's heart then ana will make Gus hafidz also like anti but it's out of control ana" I said as I hugged Asyila and was also swept away in tears together.

it turns out true my guess all this time, asyila stay away from me because Gus hafidz. I did not think that my best friend likes someone who actually likes his best friend that is me even though I myself am not sure about it. Afwan ya syil anti must be disappointed because of something that I can not control both ALLAH.

"