THE BATTLEFIELD OF LOVE
Part 56's. Susan and D'Angelo 2
We found a beautiful white dress. Whereabouts? De Angelo looks for her at an abandoned clothing store near here.
Sure oes. Our money cannot be taken, salaries are not paid, the government supports hundreds of millions of refugees, everyone is trying to stay alive. Everything now works like a socialist country, the government runs everything it can run, the factories, the jobs, the servants, all humans are the same now. Both survive from flesh-eating parasites and the brain.
There is no place for pride and selfishness anymore. Because if you do that, you'll be happily thrown to the meat-eaters out there. The economy is crumbling to the bottom, we can only survive.
"This is for you. Little gift I can find for tomorrow's event. Not buying it, but looking for it."
"Here, the white dress. Oh, my God, this is so pretty."
Susan cried tears of joy as she got and saw the gift she got in a paper bag.
I'm also excited to see Susan get her dress, at this difficult time D'Angelo still trying to give something.
"You're gonna be a beautiful bride, dear Susan,..." Me and a friend were happy for him.
"Thank you." And he hugged D'Angelo.
I'm envious. If only Fred had come back now. If he comes back, but still no news.
"Jen, maybe you should pray for him. I've been trying to find her at the center of the missing person, but never once did her name appear. I can only pray for her soul to calm down." His mother lost hope and gave up Fred. I was really devastated when I heard that on the phone later. Don't want to believe, I gave up ...
"Mom can't we hope for a little more."
"Jen, you know, if he's out there alive he's gonna find his mother, there's no way he's gonna let me wait here to worry, and he promises to come back for you. It's been over two seasons Jen. Over 7 months, Dallas and El Paso are only 10 hours away. He's a mechanic, he's a strong, smart guy, he can't steal a car and try to get back here after months. You know the answer to why that happens..."
"Mother..."
"Mom knows, you're as sick as Mom. But letting go of her soul makes me calmer. Every night I worry about her, believing God is keeping her soul somehow she is calmer and if any miracle happens she comes back. I will accept it as a miracle. Jen. You have to let it go. That's the fact, continue your life without burden, without any regrets..."
The message made me cry again all night. Susan found me sobbing by herself.
"Jen, you're fine."
"No I'm good. Sleep I just ..."
"What's wrong? Something happen?" I don't want to burden her with my sad story on her wedding day tomorrow.
"Yesterday you're okay, is there any news about him."
"Not, only her mother gave up looking for her at the missing persons center. And assume he might have been, ... " I can't continue it.
"Patience.I know it's not easy. But it's like his mother said letting it go might be better. If he's up there, he doesn't want you to be like this either. He always wants the best for you. Don't you remember that... He doesn't want you waiting for him for years without you being able to ..." Susan embraced me and did not continue her words.
"I'm sorry, you shouldn't have heard this. Tomorrow's your happy day... I kind of ruined your happy day."
"What are you saying. I'm your friend... I'm happy you're happy, you're sad I'm sad, we have each other." His embrace makes me feel better. At least here I have friends like brothers. I wiped my tears.
"Jen baby, let go of your burden, Mother Fred is right. We humans sometimes can't force things to be right, we try, but still destiny may not be our territory."
I was silent for a long time. Is this fate so cruel. But fate also overturns this world. I'm not the only one who lost. This is the reality I have to accept, I can't fight destiny, force God to follow my will. I can only accept it.
"Thank you Susan. I made you sad..."
"We're brothers here, happy and sad we're together."
"You gotta sleep, we don't have enough make up if you have eye bags." I laughed for him.
"I've been born beautiful, ..no need to make up."
"Basic cocky..." I'm laughing a little. "Where to sleep."
"Don't cry anymore. It's enough you cry, it can't bring her back." Susan hugged me again.
"Yes, I know."
My crying can't bring her back.
Hope vain. And my tears keep dripping.
I don't know when I can let it go even though I know it's a waste.